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ASIAMS.NET |
ASIAN AMERICAN ISSUES
IS THE AA GENDER DIVIDE REAL?
(Updated
Tuesday, Apr 1, 2008, 06:05:52 PM)
sian American women are abandoning AA men by the millions. Young AA women seek out any race of men but their own. Women like Amy Tan write books and make movies that dump on AA men and glorify Asian women in relationships with white men.
That's the perception of many AA men.
On what do they blame this state of affairs? Brainwashing by media that play up white men while cutting Asian men off at the knees. Desire for payback by AA women who feel slighted by their families and Asian society. Large numbers of non-Asian men with blind fetishes for Asian women. Some even acknowledge that Asian men are often too fixed in their ideas of how a woman should look and behave, causing many AF to feel devalued.
Other Asian Americans see AF outmarriage rates as merely a natural state of affairs for a 4% minority population that includes many recent immigrants. The outmarriage gender gap will narrow as growing Asian population centers provide ready access to bigger pools of singles. Besides outmarriage isn't the same as rejecting one's racial identity, they argue. Many AF who outmarry retain strong identification with their Asian identity.
Is there really an Asian American gender divide? Is so, what's behind it? If not, what's behind the perception?
This interactive article is closed to new input.
Discussions posted during the past year remain available for browsing.
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
Look in the Mirror Fool:
You wrote the following:
"Your question should be "Are THOSE AFs worth that effort?"
You will find many more AFs who do not fall under that category.
You must be an ugly Asian guy that Asian girls run away from....and non-Asians might turn to since they don't know what's considered good looking within the Asian population.
What exactly is wrong with you???? huh? Are you one of those AM who licks AF's ass and gives the rest of us a bad name: weakling, wimp, loser, or all of the above? Or are you some AF trying to justify why you despise your own race and yourself???
Why can't you let the man make his point, which is very valid I might add. By the way, I am not one of those Ugly AM that AF or any Females run away from. I tend to agree with his point. Why should a decent AM pay any attention to an AF with an attitude like that? He CAN do much better elsewhere understand.
Ok. You did mention not all AF are like that. Yes, I applaud that statement. But we all know that. No one is trashing the good ones. I appreciate a good woman regardless of race, and especially if she's AF. But the issue at hand is the gender divide yes? There's obviously enough of those AF to have this divide and this forum in the first place. So please just let the man make his point. Some of you people are ridiculous.
NYC AM (the kind that even sellout AF have the hots for)
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 22:56:00 (PDT)
[24.90.169.63]
Handsome Playboy:
You are way too high on yourself, man. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with complimenting your good looks. I do it myself and get compliments, too. I get hit on by women and gay guys.
All this talk about being a golden boy and statements like:
"I've always been popular with the ladies), I found that hitting on and picking up white women was much harder than doing the same to equally hot AFs."
are going to turn attractive Asian ladies off. Of course, I'm sure you don't make these statement to women, but it will definitely come across in your attitude.
If you're a good looking man you will get looks from all races of women. Many times guys turn women off by acting too "pretty".
Geoff DB
GeoffDB02@aol.com
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 21:50:46 (PDT)
[172.190.161.27]
NYC AM,
Actually, some Asian men are kowtowing to the White ideal by dating White women.
"Look, I'm really good with the girls. I'm the type of guy most guys wish they could be like."
If you're so good, how come all the Asian girls are fleeing from you?
Step off your self-built pedestal
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 18:37:08 (PDT)
[64.130.204.9]
AC Dropout wrote:
"So the divide from your point of view is mythical."
Huh? If huu76 is saying he isn't attracted to AFs and many AFs say they aren't attracted to AMs, doesn't that DEMONSTRATE a AA gender divide?
"If every AM has this view, than of course their are a few AF who participate in IR due to the lack of suitors."
Your IF is the exact opposite of reality.
Deng Ai
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 13:39:14 (PDT)
[198.6.73.7]
NYC Am
I'm like that. You can't tell me what's right or wrong. These are just my opinions. I just express what I believe in.
dsfbcbsijbdax
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 13:36:12 (PDT)
[148.4.22.148]
Eurocentric standards of beauty or just beauty?
If you had all the money in the world, what kind of women would you want?
Apparently young and blonde...
http://www.atimes.com/atimes/Middle_East/DI03Ak01.html
Deng Ai
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 13:34:49 (PDT)
[198.6.73.7]
Deng Ai:
I didn't say it was a no-brainer, I said "highest probability." Perhaps I've been with Julie so long it's hard for me to look at things through the eyes of me being single, uncommitted
and not knowing Julie very well.
I will concede that if it were before our third date, it would be possible (40% chance) for a Caucasian woman who was Julie's equal in every way other than ethnicity to get my attention on some level and make me reconsider. However, after my third date with Julie, it would have been impossible (probability less than 1%).
Does that make my answer any clearer?
Hank Lewis
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 13:34:27 (PDT)
[161.159.4.20]
AC Dropout wrote:
"The reason I question those statistics on AF IR and AM IR is because 25% of all asian do not participate in the census of any form. So any results based on the census is somewhat off.
Now couple with the fact that we still live in a male dominent society. I will assume for argument sake the guy is going to fill out the form. If its and asian guy upto 25% of the time the census end up in the trash. If it is a non-Asian guy chances are good it will be filled out.
Hence, all IR based on census results are biased for AF IR."
Those are mighty big assumptions you are making there. First off, how do you know 25% of all Asians don't participate in the census? If they didn't participate how do you know it's 25%? Second, are you assuming 0% of non-Asians don't participate in the census, and thus creating a disparity? How do you know non-Asians also don't participate in the census at a similar rate? Third, what does being in a male dominated society have anything to do with filling out forms? Since when did filling out forms become a male dominated activity? If you ask me, filling out forms is a hassle, if the male really dominated, the task would be relegated to the females.
"I'm not intimidated by numbers and their manipulations, nor the underlying theory behind their use."
It seems the one who is trying to manipulate numbers is you. Or to be more precise, trying to manipulate data that don't exist.
Deng Ai
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 13:32:30 (PDT)
[198.6.73.7]
cantreallyrelate:
If two guys are identical as far as education, income, personality, attractiveness, etc. in a woman's eyes other than that one is Asian and one is Caucasian, then ALL ELSE (other than their ethnicity) IS EQUAL as far as she is concerned.
Hank Lewis
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 13:31:17 (PDT)
[161.159.4.20]
Handsome Playboy
cos you don't know white women. They ve seen and heard all sorts of lame pickup lines and jokes from white men for generations. It's old to them. Smart white women reject player guys.
FOP
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 11:56:53 (PDT)
[163.181.250.2]
Geoff DB
Basically what I tried to say was there weren't as many Asian women who would date black guys as those who would date white guys. How many AF/WM couples vs AF/BM couples have we seen? I ve not seen many myself. Expressing interest and actually dating are two different matters. It's similar to the fact that there are many Asian guys who are interested in or curious about or even fantasize about dating white or non-asian women, but not many would actually do it.
FOP
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 11:46:39 (PDT)
[163.181.250.2]
Fool wrote:
"Your question should be "Are THOSE AFs worth that effort?"
You will find many more AFs who do not fall under that category."
Nope, I said what I should have said. Since after you have "cracked" them, they then become just a "regular" AF no?
"You must be an ugly Asian guy that Asian girls run away from....and non-Asians might turn to since they don't know what's considered good looking within the Asian population."
I probably am a pretty ugly looking guy. But as far as Asian girls running away, I can't say I really care, since I never had much inclination to approach them.
Deng Ai
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 11:23:52 (PDT)
[198.6.73.7]
Playboy,
you wrote
"I HONESTLY believe that a large number of white men choose to date Asian women because they cannot get white women."
You may find this hard to believe but I actually agree with you. That's been my position for quite a while.
Add to this people who are insecure, have a need to dominate and can't socialize very well.
Political Observer
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 10:48:38 (PDT)
[167.230.38.7]
Deng Ai,
you wrote
"Merely distract? According to your own theory, it should be a no brainer. Maybe your theory isn't so applicable to your own situation?"
Dammit what a cheap shot. Why pick on a guy like Hank who goes out of his way to show his support for asian guys.
Actually I would expect a comment from someone like you. You and I have disagreed before so I'm not surprised.
Political Observer
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 10:44:37 (PDT)
[167.230.38.7]
"So, dsfbcbsijbdax doesn't agree with the whole WF/AM concept.
It seems he has a more homogenous view of relationships, that's all."
I'm just a little confused, how can he have a homogenous view if he thinks that AF/WM couples are okay, but AM/WF couples are not? How is that homogenous? It's okay for AA girls to date outside their race but it's not okay for AA men? I'm not taking it personally, I'm just curious about the reasoning behind his (an AA male) hatred for AM/WF couples.
curious girl
Wednesday, September 04, 2002 at 10:34:28 (PDT)
[206.34.216.7]
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