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An AM's Reflections on His "Little Guy"

remember once being a little boy, concerning myself only with little boy things. And back then, little boys were very awed and intimidated by the adult world. I still remember the first time I got to see what a naked grown woman looked like. It was inside a drug store, where a bigger little boy tricked me into looking into a porno mag. I even remember the wonderful feelings associated with such discovery. In my innocence, I wasn't even aware of the forbiddeness of a child peering into a porno mag in public. But nobody told me to put it down.
     From that moment on, I was so much more awed at the thought of a naked woman's body than anything else on earth. I remember even getting excited about looking at fat women's boobs bounce up and down. And time made me understand that a woman's innocence in nakedness was far greater than any fully armored man.
     I recall how completely entranced I was at my first opportunity to lay hands on such heavenly flesh. And I remember my weakness without my clothes.
     But a funny thing happened. Upon first use of little Bao for something other than peeing, I was shocked to see my goddess screaming. I was ready to choke her for fear that neighbors would think that a heinous crime was being committed. I was going to pull it out in order to alleviate her suffering! But she would not allow it.
     And I finally found something in this world greater than innocent beauty. It was my ability to take away such innocence, in order to produce very violent pleasure.
     So of course you can imagine how I feel every day when I take out my little guy and use him to do something as unremarkable as peeing. At least three or four times a day, I break out laughing, that such a little helpless looking fella, so cheerful in his primary job, can become so menacing and disturbingly dangerous while performing his other job. It's a wonder that his little stature is so capable of turning a beautiful, intelligent, independent-minded, shrew of a fully formed woman into a weeping little child.
     It's not fair, I think, that I should have control of such immense power. But the alternative would make me a woman. And judging by what I see occuring when my little guy is doing his second job, it doesn't seem so bad.
by Bao
bao@math.ucla.edu


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