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BEST OF THE FISTS
PAGE 7 OF 8

"There are feelings that can be expressed in one language that dissipate when they are translated into another language."

Q: What role does sex play in a relationship?
A: Sex is a big part of it.

Q: Let's say something happened where you couldn't have sex, either because of you or her. Would that disrupt the relationship?
A: There's sex and there's love. I think with your wife, it's a combination of both. With a single man, it could be just lust. As for not being able to have sex, that's a point I've never encountered, so I don't know.

Q: So you see sex as being very essential to the relationship.
A: Absolutely.

Q: You're in a business where you see a lot of very attractive, sexy women. Do you ever lust after them?
A: I appreciate good things, beautiful things, whether it's a beautiful flower or the scent of a woman or whether it's a woman who's just knock-down gorgeous. I acknowledge it. But, in front of my wife, would I gawk at them? No, I would never disrespect my wife like that. We have a relationship where I would say to her, "Honey, what do you think of her? Don't you think she's beautiful?" My wife is confident enough where she'll say, "Yes, she's really beautiful." She has no problems with that.

Q: Can you imagine a situation where you'd try to consummate an attraction?
A: I've had opportunities and I've declined them, knowing that if I did anything I'd be bringing a great deal of headaches on myself. You have to ask yourself whether an affair is worth losing your wife over. If you don't ask yourself that question, you're a fool. Would I risk my wife, my family, for this one-time fling? I have too much time and emotion invested in what I have, and for me to blow that away doesn't make sense.
     I'm not blind to attractive women. There are a lot of beautiful women in the world, and there will always be. I, at one point in my life, had a choice to seek out a woman that fit my interpretation of what is beautiful, that fit my interpretation of a woman that I wanted. I found that, so I shouldn't have gotten married if I wanted to look elsewhere.

Q: What role did race or nationality play in your decision to marry her?
A: Love has no color barriers. Humans are not loners, they live in a society, they live with other peoples' opinions and so on, and it's more comfortable when your spouse understands where you come from, the religion or culture or whatever. There are feelings that can be expressed in one language that dissipate when they are translated into another language. If I tell my wife I love her, and then I say "Sarang hae yo," (I love you) that makes her feel closer.
     I never try to analyze the relationship, because I think it's something you shouldn't analyze. You should just flow with it. Oftentimes my wife will have an opinion, and she wants me to understand it. I do, but I tell her, "Don't expect me to agree with it." Why? Because I have my own opinions.

Q: How often do you argue?
A: We don't.

Q: How do you avoid it?
A: Here's the interesting thing: I make a rule that if it doesn't affect us directly, I don't want to talk about it. Well, we can talk about it, but I don't want to argue about it. Because no matter what, her opinions and mine are going to differ. There's nothing we can do about that, it's out of our control. If it's something that's directly in our control and we can do something about it, then we can argue about it. That's fine. But don't talk to me about some subject that is way out there and has no real relevance to our direct lives. PAGE 8

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