Asian Male/White Female Relationships | Asian American Poll

ASIAN MALE/ WHITE FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:39:10 AM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most attracts you to White females?
Their facial features | 62%
Their physique | 23%
Their attitude and personality | 12%
Their education & cultural values | 3%

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with White females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 0%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 12%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 72%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 16%

Assuming you are a White female, which of the following most attracts you to Asian males?
Their facial features | 74%
Their physique | 7%
Their attitude and personality | 14%
Their education & cultural values | 5%

Assuming you are a White female, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with Asian males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 8%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 72%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 19%

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Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.

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WHAT YOU SAY

[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]

GreenEyes, Jewish Girl, Donna and Outside Looking In: Great to hear from you four, this is my first post on the new/old message board and it's great that you are here! I'm pretty certain that most Asian guys are interested in WF's but because there's such an emphasis on WM's in US society, it wouldn't hurt for WF's to let us know that they are interested in AM's.

I've run into plenty of women of ALL races who will only date WM's so I typically wait for a signal from a woman that she's interested in me. And given that most women are taught to not be aggressive, there's the problem. I think there are plenty of potential WF/AM couples out there but it takes a little bit more time and effort from both sides, my personal guarantee is that I will make it worth your efforts!

Ciao Bellisima's!

Donna: Can we have an interpretation of your last comment? I got about half of it but I'm still puzzled... Something about a fantasy of a beautiful AM... :)
Ronbo (Bay Area) howudoinsf@hotmail.com Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 23:32:29 (PDT)

GreenEyes, Jewish Girl, Donna,
I've been reading this forum for awhile now and have always had this thought in the back of my head that I was rejected because I was asian. But after reading what you ladies wrote it just tells me that I've been just meeting the wrong type of people. I've never dated a WF before and have always wanted to. After reading posts like these again it makes me think again of what I have to do. Thanks.
Donna: I'm from CT, I've always had a thing for blue-eyed blondes. Blue eyes are so attractive.The color of the eyes just accentuates their beauty. Was wondering if I could email you?

ABT pjchen28@hotmail.com Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 22:16:16 (PDT)

Outside looking in,

I think that the percentage of Asian men in the US that would marry outside their race is relatively small, but not because AMs are not attracted to WF. The fact is that many AM's feel unattractive because of the impact of the media. Also, many AMs are more conservative and thus want women who are more conservative, which AFs generally usually are more so than WFs. Plus there are also many who are just interested in AFs.

I'm an AM who has no problem dating outside their race. But I wouldn't necessarily say that I'm the typical Asian guy because I try my best to just be an individual and not be confined to a certain type in terms of who I am and who I date. During my younger years, I was actually far more attracted to AFs than WFs or others, and I dated mostly Asian females. But during college, I've become more and more attracted to White females, as well as to Hispanic and Black females. After dating a couple of WFs, I would put my attraction to them equal or above that to AF at this time of my life.
just an opinion Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 21:21:09 (PDT)

Tony,

I went back and re-read your post. I hear ya brotha!

MIle High Asian Guy currently in the Grand Canyon State Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 20:45:17 (PDT)

Jewish Girl,

Do us a favor, spread the word!
:)
Mile High Asian Guy currently in the Grand Canyon State Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 20:42:28 (PDT)

Outside Looking in,

Even though most of my relationships have been with a WF, I believe that the AM physical appearance tends not to attract WF's. We just don't catch their attention. Of course, there are always those that are an exception to the rule.

But to answer your question, there is nothing specific that would attract an AM to a WF. Sorry, there's no magical answer. It is just like any other relationship, she has to have qualities that fit his specific standards. Me, for example. When I'm going out to meet women, physical appearance is pretty important. But when we are talking about a true relationship, far and beyond anything else, she has to have a great personality. If she doesn't have a great personality she doesn't have a chance with me.

This is my experience as far as AM's that would date and possibly marry a WF. If the AM has grown up in an area decently populated by Asians then, in general, he will be more attracted to AF. If he has grown up in an area where there are very few Asians, than it is just the opposite. If you see an AM that surrounds himself with friends that are Asian then you probably have a slimmer chance. If he is surround by white friends then you have a greater chance. As far as marriage, the few Asian friends that I have are all very open minded towards dating outside their race. Both my parents are Asian but divorced. My dad has since been in a long relationship with a WF and my brother married a WF.

In my opinion, if you find someone attractive, go introduce yourself. You never know until you talk to them. Don't let life pass you by wondering what if.....
Mile High Asian Guy currently in the Grand Canyon State Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 20:40:43 (PDT)

Ciao Bella Donna
So your fantasy is a beautiful Asian male? Hummm..I have always been attracted to blondes and blue eyes are to die for. But most importantly it doesn't matter the color of hair or eye color I love a girl with genuine caring soul. I'm bit of a free spirit, I love to travel the world and experience other cultures. Actually Italy is one of my favorite places to visit. There are so much to see and do in such a short time.
If you can muster up some courage and write I would love to chat. Open invitation to any other WF as well.

Tall, tan and bello figo :) figopete@hotmail.com Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 19:16:15 (PDT)

Zeta,

Thanks for sharing the story of Donghua Li--it was very nice. I agree that modesty is often underappreciated our society and those who have the most inner confidence don't necessarily feel the need to prove themselves. Thanks for sharing. I, too, like that many AM have inner confidence. I also like that Asian culture in general seems to promote that people are judged less by their words and more by their actions.

Southern White Girl Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 15:54:51 (PDT)

Outside Looking In,

I'm very attracted to WFs! You gals are amazing looking, very colorful physically (hair, skin) and personality-wise (strong, open to new things/experiences). I just love WFs facial features, which are very sensual. I could stare at that all night.
PadThaiGoesToWFs Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 15:54:00 (PDT)

Confident ABC:

I've lived in Williamsburg too (and many other places in VA). Williamsburg is a bit snobby in general, but I think the education level there is higher than other places in VA so I'd think the chances of meeting open-minded white women there would be better...I don't know.

I lived there before I met my husband,and later my husband lived with me in Williamsburg for a couple of years and I don't remember facing any problems. We also knew at least one other WF/AM couple there.

I did mention that I'd tell you guys what we encountered after moving to NC...so far nothing that unusual. I think so far I've only noticed a couple of black people staring at us--I'm not really sure why, but at least a couple of times it was really obvious. They weren't mean, they just stared. Maybe they were isolated cases. Anyway, I've encountered many black people since I've been here and we've had some very friendly conversations (In fact, one person invited me to his predominantly black church). Those I've actually spoken with don't really blink when I mention my husband is Chinese so, like I said maybe the staring was for some other reason or something.

I think a few white red-neck types (I don't mean to offend but I don't know how else to describe them...growing up we just called them red-necks. Hey, that's what Jeff Foxworthy calls them so I'm sticking with it) also stared at us. So far, I haven't really had any reason to go out to more rural areas where I'm sure there would be more stares. But honestly, after living in China where the stares are constant, this is nothing. Now, if someone does something more than stare I might have to hurt someone. :-) But just staring I can live with.

Our neighborhood is surpisingly diverse. One couple has lived in Japan, another is from Canada and is wife is Korean, another couple is from India, and yet another from Nigeria/England--I'm mean beside us and behind us, not in our entire neighborhood! We've had several parties and the local "N. Carolinian" neighbors seem to mingle with others as if it's no big deal. My husband scouted out this area for it's diversity though, so maybe we're a bit secluded here. I'll let you know if anything more exciting happens.

PS I was in the middle of posting a message stating that the one about me being shy was posted by an "imposter" but my hand slipped and it disappeared so if you see it know THAT one was from the REAL Southern White Girl (this is getting way too complicated!).
The Real Southern White Girl Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 15:09:57 (PDT)

I live in the Tribeca disrict of Manhattan. Any single asian men in the area?
Trisha from Manhattan Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 11:32:52 (PDT)

My boyfriend and I just broke up. He didn't have a problem going on dates with me or on vacation trips. And he definitely had no problem being intimate with me. But when it really came down to it, like meeting his parents Well, that was an entirely different story. I think dating him left a sour taste in my mouth. He kept telling me it had to do with something about first generation, and second generation crap. I don't really care. I think it was a bunch of excuses to cover up the fact that he is a Coward. I don't know if I would date another asian man. It would take alot of condideration on my behalf.
Strawberry Blond Thursday, April 18, 2002 at 11:14:43 (PDT)

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