Asian Male/White Female Relationships | Asian American Poll

ASIAN MALE/ WHITE FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:39:10 AM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most attracts you to White females?
Their facial features | 61%
Their physique | 22%
Their attitude and personality | 14%
Their education & cultural values | 3%

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with White females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 0%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 11%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 74%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 15%

Assuming you are a White female, which of the following most attracts you to Asian males?
Their facial features | 73%
Their physique | 6%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 6%

Assuming you are a White female, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with Asian males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 9%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 73%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 17%

This poll is closed to new input.
Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.

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WHAT YOU SAY

[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]

Single Asian Guy,

I'm sorry to hear about your experiences at that church. I have to agree that AM/WF face a double standard. It's definately not an easy thing. I'm not sure why it's so hard for some people to accept AM/WF relationships. I've noticed from my experiences that it tends to be the older generations that have a hard time accepting it. My co-workers tend to be my age or younger and I don't notice anything negative from them. In fact they're always encouraging me to go for the really hot ones because they're to damn chicken themselves.

If I were you...if you still see this girl or keep in touch with her. I'd just try and hook up with her. Forget what the priest thinks. It's not supposed to be his place to judge. I hate those times where I totally regret not going for someone when they were obviously interested and available. I think everyone has those feelings but they still suck.
Proud 2 b Azn Wednesday, June 26, 2002 at 06:07:08 (PDT)

ciao 'prima ballerina'... (I hope you understand Italian)

Ho studiato in Italia per cinque mese l'anno scorso. Ho viaggiato a Torino, Genova, Padova, e Sicilia (Palermo, Gibellina, etc. -- ci sono troppi... non ricordo tutti.). Ho molto piacuto Italia e i Italiani, e voglio visitare Italia ancora. Anche, ho pensato che le donne Italiane sono tante bellisime. =) Ciao bella, e un buon giorno a voi...

Un Uomo Coreano (A Korean Man) =) Wednesday, June 26, 2002 at 00:46:00 (PDT)

Pixie. Be glad your old BF left when he did. He dosent sound like a real man. No back bone. If he won't stand up for you then, he'll never do it.

As for your question. I cant speak for all asians but, I love my GF and she's my first and last (GF) because I never wanted to hurt any girl's feelings and give her the wrong impression during dating. Thats why i waited for the perfect Girl and I finally got it. For a lot of guys i think just for fun, they dont really love the girl. I think asian males are more conservative. I am a first generation AM I came to US when i was little dude and have the culture of US with old traditions. Also i am a christian so that definatley played a role. My point in saying that is older generation of asian males 3rd or 4th might have acclimated into the main stream american culture. So watch out for them. The american culture has a poor performance in the area of love with over 50% divorce rate.

You can usually tell if a guy loves your or just playing you. Dont lie to yourself, trust your gut instincts. They're nearly always right!!! also if you dont think he loves you or you love him at first. It's over, love dosent grow where it dosent even have root.

Good luck
SOG Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 23:56:43 (PDT)

locke maison:

I really like the optimism of your last post. It took me a while to realize it, but WF attraction to Asian men is a lot more prevalent than you might think. I empathize with your situation, and know of some other AMs in similar straights, but I think we could all do ourselves a world of good by refusing to be victimized.

The first girl who had a crush on me in elementary school was a blonde/blue eyed angel. My first kiss was with a white girl. Matter of fact, I didn't start dating Asian until college. And I've met quite a few white women who have admitted that they have 'Asian fetishes'. More than you might think.

The point of all this is not to boast about my exploits--there's not a whole lot to boast about anyway, and lord knows I despise those guys who brag about how hot they are, etc. On the contrary, I'll be quite honest: I'm not all that tall (about 5'9"), I'm skinny, and I have chronically bad haircuts (goddamn Asian hair...it's just SO unmanageable...). (But to be fair to myself, I've got a somewhat cute face, I can turn on the charm, and I've got this terrific 'artsy-intellectual' thing going that chicks seem to dig.) The point is that if an average joe like myself can date interracially, then all you other good-looking guys on Goldsea can do a lot better!

So kudos to you for your last post; we need to share as much encouragement as possible when the media has the cards stacked so high against us. Hey, where do you live? If you live in LA, let's go out and get some beers sometime and try and pick up some women. heheh. :P
Chris (Poet/Warrior) fearless1976@yahoo.com Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 21:15:20 (PDT)

Locke Maison
Geee wheezzz...thanks for nothing, next time don't assume most Asian American men are pathetic as yourself. If you were self confident from the beginning you wouldn't of believed anything the white male dominated media has to say. Especially the hyocritical, sneaky, Jew Hollywood writer, producers and directors.
Pixie: Stop with your over generalizations, just because you had one bad experience with an AM you assume we are all programed the same way?
How naive.
Red Devil Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 19:52:53 (PDT)

AM Psychologue,

Well put, I guess I am just at the impatient point with this guy. I always like to know what's going on and I also like things to be resolved in a mature way. We have LOTS of tension just as friends! But I feel we also understand more about each other than either of us is willing to admit.
Brunette girl, Too! Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 19:20:42 (PDT)

Go Playa!
This is going to sound really strange, but I am going to say 'thanks' for waking me up.

Hope This Helps,
Thank you too. I really want to say something to him, but the fact is that I am a little scared about what will happen in the future and the fact that he is a little moody.

Brunette girl, Too! Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 18:41:27 (PDT)

Pixie,

Personally I find both WF and AF to be total hotties. I won't deny that there is pressure to date or marry within our own race. I think it happens on both sides just about equally. Bottom line I for one would go all the way and marry a WF if I was positive that she was right for me. The thing is I think most guys would fight for the someone they loved...well...the guys worth being with would do that.
Proud 2 b Azn Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 17:46:27 (PDT)

curious girl,

Although I think it's kinda strange to be refered to as a slab of fatty meat...but if a WF wants to refer to me as a HAM all I have to say is OINK OINK! 8-)
Proud 2 b Azn Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 17:29:25 (PDT)

I believe that interracial marriages can really work. It just takes two people who truly believe in each other with unconditional love. And not letting the outside influences interfere. I have seen it so many times when someone lets people interfere. My husband and I ended up moving away to another state. It was too painful what my family was putting us through. My sister let them break up her marriage of 2 years with her japanese husband. She is so unhappy with her life now. She should have never listened to them.
strawberryshortcake Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 17:01:04 (PDT)

I travel a whole lot on the road. So I don't really have time to maintain any friendships or relationships. I haven't really met too many Asian dudes. The ones I have met are way too shy. I would be very open to having some wicked sex with one though. I know it sounds crude and vulgar the way I put it, but thats the way I am. I don't have too much shame. I just say what I feel and never apologise for it. I have seen some hot looking Asian dudes out in LA. I notice not too many ride motorcycles. I wonder why that is? When I say they don't 'ride' motorcycles, I mean I haven't seen many Asian Bikers. Ya know what I mean man? Thats all I'm saying. I fix alot of bikes and race car engines. I am going to be hitting the road real soon with some of my friends. We are gonna ride out to Colorodo. Good luck to everbody on here.
[[a bikerChiCk's opinioNs]] Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 15:51:40 (PDT)

Hello all. Being a WF I would like to weigh in on this topic. I have dated men of all races (well alot) ;-) I've talked to other girls about men of other races and the complications/cultural differences that get in the way. I know that with alot of Asian families the parents dont approve of white women for their sons or white men for their daughters. You might disagree and I hope you do... but after talking to friends white and asian alike it seems to be the greatest obstacle. I find it strange that some women told me they would be more ready to deal with a black family and felt they would be more readily accepted.

I was wondering if anyone here has had family issues come up because of their interracial dating? And wether or not you feel that Asian parents can be an obstacle?
amazon chela700@hotmail.com Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 15:26:25 (PDT)

Hey you know Noah had three sons. in the boat with him. I think we have three main races ASIAN WHITE and BLACK. Pretty crazy isnt it?

oh another thing I think if we all interbred over and over we would all look like middle eastern people. Maybe more attractive!. They did this with dogs and after ahile all the dogs looked the same!!!

And the asian guy whose pastor is giving you a hard time about interracial dating. You should seriously have a hard talk with him. Explain to him why he's thinking is wrong. Use biblical examples. The only reason i am telling you to be nice to him is he's a christian and deserves higher respect as a brother than other folks.

Go for the white girl thats hot you like. We need more AM\WF couples out here. I wonder how many people post on this site???
SOG (christian) Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 15:08:41 (PDT)

To Pixie,
I can't speak for the rest of Asian men, but I would definitely marry a white girl if she made me the happiest man in the world! There are good/bad apples in every race and I'm the one who has to live with one if I marry a bad apple not my family. Luckily my family is somewhat liberal and wants to see me happy in the end. My mom once asked me, "can you please bring home a nice Viet girl?" I said no becuase it's my life to live and not yours. I choose to date whoever. Case closed.

There are plenty of liberal AM with liberal familys out there. OR find an AM with a backbone who will stand up against those pressures from family and friends. Good luck in your search.
Viet guy in Houston Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 14:12:54 (PDT)

Pixie:

I think that a lot of AMs do in fact see a WF as something to be admired, maybe played with, and then discarded for an old-fashioned AF. But those particular men are better off doing so; I don't think they would last even a month with most of the WFs I know, including myself. I don't know about you, but I don't cook, iron shirts, or act like the "little woman," the kind of woman that so many AMs seem so enamored with. But if you could find an AM who could handle you, I believe you would have found yourself a very good catch.
2 hot 2 handle wf Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 11:34:11 (PDT)

Hi Single Asian Guy =)

You sound mad and surprised and disapointed that those black men in your church didn't get any attitude but you did. I'm half Italian and Hungarian and I don't understand the American ways of thinking. Is it acceptable for Asians to expect no attitudes from other American, yet expect blacks in America to get attitudes. Do Asians in America feel that they should be special when it comes to prejudice from white Americans.
prima ballerina Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 11:30:35 (PDT)

Hi AzN-aKiRa-21=)

You do sound like a child and I think what you said was silly. You want Asian men to approach as many women as they can in one week just so they can count how many rejections they can get? This will hurt the Asian man's image and not help it.
prima ballerina Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 11:25:23 (PDT)

Whoever posted as "The REAL Megan"
to AsianGuy and SOG on the times of:
Monday,June 24,2002 at 14:02:36(PDT)
Monday,June 24,2002 at 13:58:10(PDT)

I did not write those posts. Someone is still using my name. Obviously this person either has the same first name as me, or they are doing it to prove some point (there really is no point when you really think about it)...

I also don't agree with this persons views and ideas. I am beginning to think this is my evil twin sister! AAARRG! Could it be so? Could I really have an evil twin out there? hmmm.

Curious Girl,
Thank you for your encouraging comment. I feel the way you do. I still feel I have alot to learn and alot to work on.
just Megan Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 11:03:29 (PDT)

Pixie,
It's true that there's some pressure from family for AM's to end up with AF's. But the decision on who we end up with is really up each single individual. So if you ever get involved with another AM, discuss about these things him and what he really thinks about it.
ck Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 10:29:34 (PDT)

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