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POLL & COMMENTS
ASIAN MALE/ WHITE FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated
Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:39:10 AM
to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)
This poll is closed to new input.
Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
curious girl,
Without being too defensive I'd like to point out in my last post that I did go out with a heavier woman. Yes the weight issue is a personal preference but it's not THAT important to me.
heath fitness instructor,
I find a lot of people like to conseal their disdain for larger people by bringing up the "cardiovascular" issue. Who on the face of this earth does not know about the negative health effects associated with obesity? I don't need you to point that out to me.
Secondly, I'd like to point out that your manners in the way you speak to people is less then impressive. As far as I'm concerned you're a loser for instigating something that was completely unnecessary. But then again that's right. Your a fitness instructor and probably only have at most a high school education. You should try not being so crass maybe you'll actually make a friend someday.
Proud 2 b Azn (AM)
Tuesday, July 16, 2002 at 10:30:23 (PDT)
Curious Girl,
Thanks for all the nice things you're saying about my photos! I think it's perfectly natural for young men (and women) in their 20s to still be experiencing and discovering themselves. But a man who's more sure in what he wants quickly understands what a great girl he has. That understanding often comes with age. But I think a great strength of AM is that once we commit, we rarely divorce. We take marriage VERY seriously. Of the 50-70 marriages I know of 5+ years involving AM, only 3 have seen divorce. Not bad, I think!
P.S. I'd love to see your photo; if you could send it to me, I'd appreciate it!
Hoboken_CornellGuy james193a@yahoo.com
Tuesday, July 16, 2002 at 08:42:28 (PDT)
Hi Auburn haired Lady, 21,
I am beginning to like you! Please stay around with us.
In regard to people looking at you, well, all I am saying it "Auburn haired Lady, Here's looking at you, kid."
Have a great day!
horseshoe(am)
Tuesday, July 16, 2002 at 06:47:01 (PDT)
Hoboken_Cornell Guy,
I've dated 2 different Asian men, one Corean and one Chinese, and both of them had little to no body odor at all. Pretty nice! I don't mean to put down white men in any way, I like white men very much, but I think that in general they tend to have a stronger body odor. I think it's just genetics. But really that's one of the last considerations for dating someone.
DoubleD,
About the divorce question. It seems that Asian societies look down on American society because of our 50% divorce rate, and say that that proves that Caucasians can't stay in stable relationships, which may be one reason why Asians don't want their son/daughter to marry a non-Asian. I can understand this, 50% divorce rate does sound pretty bad.
I think it might be a cultural difference. Now mind you I'm no expert, but I think that in Asian societies, which tend to be more conservative, you stay married no matter what, you just don't get divorced. I know in Corea it carries a big social stigma (ex b/f told me), as if something was wrong with you. But in the US I think part of it is that there isn't nearly as much of a stigma around divorce, and if people just can't make a marriage work, they decide to stop being miserable together and split up.
I think it's important to take marriage very seriously, and to try your hardest to work out your problems. But if there is abuse, alcoholism, cheating, occurring, then it might be best to end it, both for the partners' sake and the childrens' sake.
I think another factor is the US women's liberation movement of the 60's and 70's, which freed women from being forced to be a wife and mother, when maybe a lot of them wanted a career or to remain single.
Now I'll ask you, what do you think of the high divorce rate? How do you think divorce is viewed in Asian society? I know that the family has extreme importance to Asians.
curious girl
Tuesday, July 16, 2002 at 06:43:04 (PDT)
Auburn Hairy Lady,
Come on you still didn't answer my question properly. I was expecting a more intelligent answer. I guess shallow Matt was right "an idiot is an idiot." First of all, YOu wanna know why I'm here? Because I'm an Asian male who is FOR interracial relationship with WF. Yes this is a website for interracial relationship and yes it attracts people of other races BUT you say you don't like AM so, again you shouldn't be here. Ok, so you never dated an AM, we don't want you anyway, you're probably too skinny, (no ass, no brain of course).
I'm happy that you're making lots of dough in this day and age where job security don't exist. But I would rather be happy and poor than making lots of $$$ and come onto a website to myself out to be an ASS on enemy's territory.
lordt78
Tuesday, July 16, 2002 at 06:01:45 (PDT)
Asian Brother,
Please do not take offense to this post but I just want to share my honest opinions about your last post so you can see another side of it.
I don't understand why you choose to avoid dating white women who have previously dated Asian men, when you yourself have previously dated white women. So you can and they can't? I mean, at that rate, we can say the same thing that you do. We can say, "oh we don't want to date an AM who has dated WF before because he could have preconcieved ideas about WFs or just think of us as trophies" or whatever else. I think thats unreasonable.
Plus, I don't know how common AM/WF pairings are in your area, but in my area so few WF are attracted to AM that I've never met one. So if you're going to take all the WF that have been involved with AM (which would be most of the women on this board, also) then you're limiting your chances by a great percentage. Everyone have their own preferences, but I'm just saying that I think you're really numbering your chances with this particular pairing if you view it that way.
curious wf
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 23:18:46 (PDT)
Hoboken_CornellGuy,
Dude do not post any questions about body odor. It's totally disguisting and rude. Women don't wanna think or hear about body odor. C'mon man, what's the matter with you? that's no way to score any points nor is it relevant to any intelligent conversation about culture. This must be gag, because most people wouldn't ask such questions!
Empyrean20 Empyrean20@aol.com
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 21:27:04 (PDT)
Hi guys, I will try to clarify any questions you may have again. I am not here to put anyone down, please don't think that. but please read carefully.
To Deng Ai: Answers to your first two questions: yes and yes. The correct way to look at someone is with respect. Staring is bad, but two second "glances" are acceptable. But the rule is to not let it exceed beyond two seconds.
To Double D: thanks for understanding.
To Hold the mayo who said "i doubt a lot of AMs stare at you. people who say that looks are not important are usually ugly. sure, looks aren't the most important, but they're right up there." -----i never said that looks aren't important, you must have read my post too fast or something. you should reread it to reclarify things. i say that looks are overrated amongst AA. Interesting how the most unnattractive guys (you) are still the most shallow.
Look I am not going to try to make everyone see things the way i see it. but just remember to keep an open mind from a different point of view.
Hi, Mile High Asian Guy, and as usual, you always come up with non-offensive words to get your point across. I like that. Well, to answer your question, my sister has been through 3 failed relationships with AM, and she has been very hurt in the past, and the present relationship is not causing her to be any happier. I ask her why does she do this? and she says that even she does not know. she seems to be very attracted to AM, and vice versa, however. I am just baffled as to why she keeps on coming back for more to get her heart broken over and over again. i guess that is why i am a little upset at AM, i know it is wrong for me to generalize AM as a whole due to my sister's experiences. I just don't know where else to get to know AM's. I must think they are intriguing creatures for my sister to be so crazy about them?
to chris: let me clarify, that i didn't find AM attractive, not solely on physical aspects. but more of their attitudes i guess. and judging from the responses from AM on this message board, their attitudes aren't that much better than the ones in real life. these guys seem to have very high egos, which is very bad because that means that if a WF who tells them that they are all that, and seem to worship them, they will fall for it easily and turn into mush. (that is what a over inflated ego does to you)
but you did state that "Are you just basing your opinion of AMs just on the basis of the posts here on this forum? Because if that's the case, then I think you're getting an unfair representation of the AM mentality" ---- so maybe you are right, i am getting an unfair representation. but where else would i get a 'fair representation' but online places like this..
good point that you point out "The only other thought I had is that a lot of people might have trouble believing that you're anti-superficiality when in fact, you're a model by profession. " ----- this profession is just like any other business out there. its just purely business. when i am not working, i am really who i am. suppose you are a taxi driver, when you come home to your wife and kids, are you still a taxi driver? i dont think so. 99% of models are just like you and me. another thing is that i chose this profession because 2 years ago, i needed money for college. i was so short on money that i went to the agency and decided to do this for part time to pay for college. well turns out, it paid so well that i decided to do it for a living. that is all there is to it.
ok i am verrrry tired now lol from responding to most of the posts. i have responded to half of them, and i will respond to the others if i feel like, later. damnit i need to go to bed.
Auburn haired Lady, 21
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 20:35:58 (PDT)
Hey Curious girl,
You can send me the picture if you like. My address is below. Thanks
DoubleD (AM) de12be22@yahoo.com
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 19:07:32 (PDT)
Hey all..
Thanks for going gentle with me...lol. I add more pictures frequently (proud mama syndrome ) so do check back now and again to see my two favorite guys!!
As far as family size - we just have the one son, but my husband comes from a family of 5 boys, and all save for one are married with kids. Holidays are pretty big affairs, but having come from a very small family, I love finally being a part of such a gathering..
I am really getting a kick out of seeing some of your faces at last, and is it just my thinking or are there some just amazingly gorgeous guys on here? What the heck!?? UNFAIR!! lol..where were you all when I was young and single and wanting to mingle? .
Happy Clam wschien1@mchsi.com
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 18:58:49 (PDT)
So you're 5'8" and 120... very nice.
I'm 6'4" (hard to believe, huh) and 185 pounds. I'm actually the lean and long type, you know, the swimmer's build. I won't lie and say I'm super muscular, but I am cut and lean, which the ladies don't seem to mind, at all. I actually prefer women that are at least 5'10" because of my height, so unless you were very pretty and had a spectacular character trait that hooked me, I wouldn't give you a chance, no offense. Come to think of it, that's probably why I haven't dated too many Asian women. I haven't met a single one that was tall enough AND that I clicked with. Anyway I don't date on the internet (I think it's geeky), so it's not like anything would ever happen between us, right "Miss Model"? ;) But thanks for giving me an idea of what you look like. Ta-ta.
Arrogant Oriental S.O.B.
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 18:15:27 (PDT)
Regarding Auburn Haired Lady,
You folks are being duped. AHL is no lady at all. "She" says she has never found AM's attractive at all and then later says she's decided we're unattractive because we treat women as sex objects. Which is it troll? Only a guy posing as a woman would say something that stupid. Women are not naive enough to think that men do not first consider a woman's sex appeal, before later appreciating her other qualities. Multi-billion dollar markets in cosmetics, fashion, and advertising realize this also. We have this guy without a life who every now and then tosses out an inflamatory statement posing as whatever to get people riled up. He has been here for a long time and counts on people forgetting his MO. Stop responding to him and he'll go limp again.
Naki
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 18:13:50 (PDT)
I am so happy to hear of so many other WF/AM couples! I live in a racially diverse part of L.A. and I rarely see IRs that are WF/ AM. Its such a shame that so many AMs dont think that I would be attracted to them. When I go to afterhours clubs (which are predominantly asian in L.A.) the guys are much more respectful and polite than in other party scenes, and if you're a tall blonde girl at a rave with your asian boyfriend nobody gives you any stress, while alot of white guys, whether in the party scene or on the street, will be like "what are you doing with him" right to our faces! I think asian men deserve alot more respect, especially when it comes to their sexuality, they're not lacking a damn thing, I'm even whipped on one right now.
goldilocks briannabrianna506@msn.com
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 18:00:21 (PDT)
Auburn Haired Lady:
You said "What I may have failed to mention was that AM's personality is unnattractive"
What is it about AM personality that you don't like?
You should meet some AM (not in bars or parties, but e.g. in the park, Chinese cooking class) and have some good decent conversations with them. Then, you will gain more understanding of AMs (e.g. what values they were taught, what they think of WF, why do they do this, that etc..)
Additionally, do you mind getting your sister, who is dating an AM, to post some comments in this forum? Also, have you asked your sister why she is dating an AM? Maybe you/we can learn from her open-mindness.
Tiananmen
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 15:36:45 (PDT)
Caucasian female Commenter:
I understand what you are saying about some AM trying to be someone they are not. I know an AM that tries to act cool by wearing expensive clothing or having a cell phone or using words they consider is cool. I just laugh at it because I know they'll realize some day that materialism and trying to get accepted is not the way to go. But can we blame them? Certainly, this isn't just with the AMs, but also, considering how others think of AM as short, geeky, asexual it is not surprising that they try to act the opposite. I believe that in finding a g/f AMs have the hardest time, especially when dating WF. This is probably because the AM's parents don't discuss dating girls. So the AM has to take an unfamiliar walk when dating. Thus they can do stupid things, but it isn't their fault; it's part of the process.
Next time you look at an AM trying to be someone he's not; don't be turned off or anything, just think to yourself that it's natural, especially for struggling AMs in this age to find himself.
Tiananmen
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 15:25:35 (PDT)
To Happy Clam!
Beautiful family :) Your child is so cute too. You're a very pretty lady :) Thanks for sharing with everyone. I have pictures of our son on my Asian Avenue page which you can find on www.asianavenue.com and look under Hannybunbun. I will have pictures up on my art business website next week also of my husband and I along with pictures of my paintings and sculptures, almost all inspired by my husband and son. It is still under construction , I am still working on the links, that is www.jadegirlart.com.
I think it is put faces to names on here.
Hannybunbun
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 14:49:34 (PDT)
Ok for all the pretty white girls out there. I hear that women dont rate looks as #1 unlike guys. Is that true? comeon be honest. I find that fascinating.
Something about guys look for the most "fertile" females, and looks are a good indicator of health and ability to bear children.
Women can be inseminated by an older guy and is more inclined to look at the financial situation. nesting syndrome.
while i am at it. To guys on this forum, why do men freak out about breastfeeding??? Whats not to like? the baby, breasts and milk. All good stuff
SOG
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 14:45:56 (PDT)
Asian guys deserve the best and FAT aint gonna cut it. Thats the hard truth. I'll be even harder on misty because she is already married.
What is your problem?????????.
SOG
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 14:36:35 (PDT)
Happy Clam,
You look attractive. I do think you look a bit on the hefty side. Your kid is cute. You need to watch his eating habits though. You don't want him to end up like his mommy. I hope you don't get offended. You did post for everyone to see your pics. Right? Not everyone is going to be in favor of them.
I think your hubby is okay. But I still say he got himself a mighty hefty woman. Aren't you embarrassed? Is that your family? They are all somewhat on the hefty side too. Does your family have a consistant diet? You all should consider a healthy eating regimen. If you don't mind I would like to email you and reccomend a proper one for you and your entire family. You all need lots of help. I think I can be of some assistance.
S.T. post
Monday, July 15, 2002 at 14:05:10 (PDT)
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