Asian Male/White Female Relationships | Asian American Poll

ASIAN MALE/ WHITE FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated Tuesday, Apr 1, 2008, 05:28:59 PM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most attracts you to White females?
Their facial features | 61%
Their physique | 22%
Their attitude and personality | 14%
Their education & cultural values | 3%

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with White females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 0%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 11%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 74%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 15%

Assuming you are a White female, which of the following most attracts you to Asian males?
Their facial features | 73%
Their physique | 6%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 6%

Assuming you are a White female, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with Asian males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 9%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 73%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 17%

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Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.

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WHAT YOU SAY

[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]

Samantha)

I have thought about learning to speak Japanese. I think it might improve things a bit, and help me to communicate better with people here. Was it very difficult to learn Japanese? How long did it take you to learn? When you made friends with the Japanese people, what were they like at first? Was it easy for you to trust them right away? The people here are so very polite and sweet. I just need to learn to communicate in the Japanese language with them. My lover said that some places around have signs that read non-japanese are not allowed. Why is that? He explained to me that some places I am not allowed to go, because I am an american, and a wf! Did you see that stuff too when you were here?
Wf in Japan Saturday, August 17, 2002 at 15:06:25 (PDT)

Here's my true story. It contains some "graphic" nature. If you object to some adult related story, please don't continue.

I went to a dance club tonight. This was the first time I went there. The place was very dark compared to other clubs I'd been to. It's like an underground club kind of thing. Another thing I noticed was that the crowd was mostly whites and some Asian guys. No Asian girls, Almost no blacks. Which I thought kinda unusual.

Anyway, there were 2 white girls dancing together on the floor. From they way they moved, I could tell they were more than friends. Anyway, at one point I happened to stand near them. One of them (the taller one) saw me and grabbed my hand to dance with her. The next thing I knew both of them were dancing with me, pressing their bodies against mine with one being in the front and the other in the back. Sandwich style as they call it.

I really didn't know what happened, but I think both of them were kinda "hot". They rubbed my body everywhere. And I had no choice but responded the same way :) I realized that the shorter girl was actually very cute. I turned to her and basically went all over her.

[Graphic descriptions omitted]

I think later on the taller girl noticed that I liked her friend better, and she didn't like it. Afterall it was her who grabbed me earlier. Maybe feeling threatened, she finally took her friend away from me and left to the bar.

When they came back to the dance floor moments later, I approached them but she, the taller one, gave me a cold shoulder. She even didn't let me talk to her friend.

When the club was closing, I bumped into them again. I asked them if I could contact them some time. The taller girl responded that they (she and her friend) wanted to be together now. I got the message. I backed off. But before they left, the shorter girl smiled at me and said "thank you".
One Happy Asian Man Saturday, August 17, 2002 at 02:58:37 (PDT)

Hi friends,

Any of you guys speak Mandarin? I was born and raised in Taiwan, and I speak Mandarin fluently. On April 15 this year, while working, I met a cute blond girl who speaks Mandarin as fluently as me. She is interested in Asian culture. Too bad I did not even ask her for her name. She told me she was married to an Asian guy, got divorsed, had a son, etc. I am kind of feel sorry for her. I actually prayed for her many times. I wish I can see her again.

Anyways, guys, the message is that if you speak Mandarin, you can volunteer as a Mandarin tutor in local colleages that has Asian Study program. Some girls there are very pretty and love Asian guys! Good luck!
Christian Guy Friday, August 16, 2002 at 22:18:14 (PDT)

To the Asian men here- have any of you had to deal with racism from your girlfriend's families, whether blatant or veiled? How did you react? How did your g/f's react?

" ok, when I started dating my ex, her mother didn't like the idea of her daughter dating a CoreanAmerican. But this was before she met me in person. After months of dating her we decided to meet her parents and spend our vacation in Milano, Italy. Cris told me her family rule was never bring home a black or a "Terrone" southern Italian, apparently Northen Italians do not like southern Italians either. But she told me her family never had a negative image of Asians. Her mother seem fridenly enough but I could tell she was checking me out so I felt uneasy with her alone. Rest of her family were just a blast, her brother, father and uncles were great. I tried to win her mother over by helping her with her gardening, her favorite, soon enough by the end of our vacation I had her eating out of my hand. She even came to visit us in US.

Also have you ever felt torn between dating WFs or BFs that you're attracted to, and dating an AF out of some kind of duty to your families?
curious girl Friday, August 16, 2002 at 09:15:29 (PDT)

I would never date someone out of duty to my family,its my life and whoever I chooses my family should support us.
Azzuri Friday, August 16, 2002 at 18:24:21 (PDT)

JJP,
I actually see more AM/WF pairing in the media than AM/AF pairings believe it or not.
Deng Ai Friday, August 16, 2002 at 16:29:43 (PDT)

I don't understand this people giving you wierd looks thing either. The people that I usually catch looking at me are girls and the guys usually look at my girl. So I don't see anything unusual here. I have never had anyone say anything negative to me. The only people who question me are Asians. And usually they ask if I like AFs or not.
Deng Ai Friday, August 16, 2002 at 16:27:33 (PDT)

Samantha:
Travel is great if you have the opportunity. I think it would be good to be able to show a young child how different cultures live also - because to grow up in America without seeing how others live in the world, a person can take for granted their lifestyle and think everyone lives the same way (hope that makes sense).
When is your baby due? You may have to wait a little while to travel with him or her though!

You asked about Japan. I visited several places - Fujisawa, Kyoto, Tokyo. The easiest transportation method I found was by train - they have a fantastic system. The trains do tend to get busy of course when the business people are going to work. Interestingly enough, I can still remember standing on a train and having an older Japanese businessman standing so close to me I swear I could feel his breath on my neck. He was just staring at me intently during the entire journey. I have no idea what he was thinking - I'm very fair skinned since I'm English - and he was pretty dark. It was a strange feeling.

There are many temples and shrines to visit - and department stores in the cities have beautiful items. Check out the silks they use to make Kimonos if you ever get to visit - I've never seen anything like it.

In many ways, Japan reminds me of England. There is a great deal of history and because the islands are approx. the same size as Britain, space it utilized to the max.

Tell me something Samantha, you mentioned that you get depressed a lot. Is there a specific reason?
Samantha Friday, August 16, 2002 at 15:08:11 (PDT)

Curious Girl,
Welcome back from the Caribbean. I think the forum suffered because of the absence of your excellent questions! *smile*
Racism from my ex-girlfriends' families? I can't say I've ever encountered negative reactions because of my race from any of my ex-girlfriends' family members. I know parents really take to me because I'm clean-cut, well-mannered and treat their daughters with respect. A boring guy if you're into "bad boys".... but a parents' wet dream! *smile*
There was a Lithuanian-Canadian girl I dated who was nervous about introducing me to her friends and family; she had never dated anyone who wasn't white and everything was new to her (stares, etc.). When she brought up the subject with her mother, her "Old Country" mother shocked her by defending me. She said (I paraphrase) "Don't close your mind to him. Asian men make very good husbands; they work hard, respect their wives and believe in family."
I had an ex-girlfriend's ex-husband who initially hated me before ever meeting me, but that was because I was younger and skinnier than him. Otherwise, my motto for suspicious individuals on the woman's side is "I'll make it impossible for them to hate me"! *smile*
I'd dated AFs out of a sense of political correctness, but I'm great friends with my parents and they have accepted that I'm my own man and will make my own decisions. I've read some stories about how AMs' parents give their sons a hard time about them dating/marrying WFs (Lotus' story, for example). It's hard for me to understand, as my parents are more concerned that she's educated, has good family values and is a decent person. Great if she's Asian, but they've been in-country long enough to understand that if I marry, she will be white (AFs just don't do it for me on a physical level). They're just worried that at age 36, marriage is a big "IF" for me! *smile*
Hoboken_CornellGuy Friday, August 16, 2002 at 13:59:53 (PDT)

Hi Asian Guy 5243, the link is:

http://goldsea.com/Air/Issues/Irmen/irmen.html

You can see Russell's Sweet Delight and I furiously battling it out with MLK!
curious girl Friday, August 16, 2002 at 12:30:52 (PDT)

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