Asian Male/White Female Relationships | Asian American Poll

ASIAN MALE/ WHITE FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated Tuesday, Apr 1, 2008, 05:28:57 PM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most attracts you to White females?
Their facial features | 61%
Their physique | 22%
Their attitude and personality | 14%
Their education & cultural values | 3%

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with White females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 0%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 11%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 74%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 15%

Assuming you are a White female, which of the following most attracts you to Asian males?
Their facial features | 73%
Their physique | 6%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 6%

Assuming you are a White female, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with Asian males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 9%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 73%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 17%

This poll is closed to new input.
Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.

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WHAT YOU SAY

[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]

As for your story regarding the "Food Stand Guy", I've experienced a similar story. My ex-gf who was white and I went out to eat at a chinese place and when they brought out out utensils, the waitress automatically gave her a fork and me chopsticks. When she asked our server for chopsticks, she was all suprised that she actually knew how to use them. Needless to say, my ex was a little irritated."
-Max

That was a big faux pas on the part of the waitress. She may have done that on purpose because these days everyone knows how to use chopstix. Was the waitress of similar age and possibly a potential available female/rival? If so maybe she was trying to send an ever so subtle message. I've worked a few restaurants in my day and the staff there can at times be something other than seemingly faceless, non entities.
Former Wait Person Tuesday, August 20, 2002 at 13:17:07 (PDT)

I'm interested in Japan, and came across this site one day. I remembered where to find it. It's an association for foreign women living with Japanese men in Japan.

http://home.att.ne.jp/surf/cei/AFWJ.html

Good luck!
info Tuesday, August 20, 2002 at 10:02:18 (PDT)

Deng Ai,
It's not that I don't see attractive AFs, as there are obviously lots of them. But for me (and many AMs on this board, I imagine), I've always been more attracted to WFs. I like their looks; their eyes, facial structures and hair. It's not that I prefer certain hair or eye colors, but comparing a pretty WF and a pretty AF; I will be more attracted to the pretty WF. I don't question why, that's just the way it is!
Hoboken_CornellGuy Tuesday, August 20, 2002 at 09:41:43 (PDT)

I'm really frustrated with the AMs that I have met. I was seeing a Viet guy for a few months, but he was too secretive. He doesn't answer my emails (only once a month), even though he said we were still friends. We did not end things on a sour note, either. Then I met an AM at the gym, who evaded me, too. He ignored me to the point where I (finally) got the message that he wasn't interested. Since then, I met a nice AM, and we had drinks and talked. He said he's not looking for anything serious, just someone to go out dancing and partying with. I agreed. I emailed him the next day to thank him for the nice evening, and he responded and asked me out again. But I haven't heard from him since. I refuse to call him, since he was the one who asked me out. He seemed very sincere and happy at the time, so I'm confused. How much time do I let pass before I should assume he won't contact me? Also, one of these men mentioned that it's important to maintain some "mystery" with women. Guys, this is bull****. I think most women prefer honesty to stupid games. I'm not saying that all AMs are this way, or that men of other races are perfect (hell no), but I'm getting so disappointed by this "mysterious" crap, and I'm not imagining it. Does anyone have any constructive insight on this?
Sue (I'm back) Tuesday, August 20, 2002 at 09:05:12 (PDT)

To all white females:

I am an Asian-American male living in northeast Pennsylvania where it is predominantly white.. I consider myself an average looking dude.. I get stares from white females wherever I go - the mall, church, even at work..

My question is this: Are they attracted to me? Or are they staring at me because they have never seen an asian guy before? Are white females really attracted to exotic-looking men?

thanks.
Confused Asian Dude Tuesday, August 20, 2002 at 06:32:51 (PDT)

Nelp advice.

What are the chances of finding WF brunettes who are interested in AM in BC, Canada ?
truthexplorer renaissance9999@hotmail.com Tuesday, August 20, 2002 at 01:11:04 (PDT)

Hi friends,

I did a calculation of ratio of WF interested in Asian guys. On the internet dating web site, there are 16 WF's out of every 284 girls of all race looking for Asian guys. That is 5.6%. I looked at African American internet dating sites as well. There are far fewer WF's looking for BM. However, you see way more WF/BM couples. I think the reason for that is that WF/BM couples face less social pressures.
Christian Guy Monday, August 19, 2002 at 22:06:14 (PDT)

One Happy Asian Man,
The shorter girl thanked you for being her tool with which to make her girlfriend jealous. After that the two of them went home to kiss and make up. Meanwhile, you left alone and sign yourself as One Happy Asian Man for simply being used. A sad case indeed. Get some self-respect.
Naki Monday, August 19, 2002 at 18:33:06 (PDT)

Curious Girl,

Once again, you've impressed me by asking a great question. Do I ever worry about being too Americanized and loosing my asian culture and laguage?

Frist of all, I was born in the U.S. in Portland, Oregon. I've lived here all my life. I lived in the suburbs where the schools I went to I was one of no more than 5 other asian kids. I was always surrounded by my asian family and spoke cantonese, mandarin, and english. I never really stopped to think about these things til later in high school and much more intensely when I hit college. Just about all my friends were white and all the girls I dated were also white. My few experiences with asian girls at the time were not pleasant ones. For a brief time I thought asian girls were scandalous, stuck-up, and
materialistic. Then I realized every race has its flies. Today, I still speak mandarin fluently, however I lost about 90% of my cantonese from lack of practice.

When I hit college I began to seek out other asians and I dated a couple as well. I just began to opening myself to people of all races for friendship and romance.

As a child I was completely unaware of media portrayals anything of the like, but in my younger years I was definitley on my way to becoming fully white-washed. I think what saved me was my contact with my family and also practicing my mandarin. I was always surrounded my white friends, and that's all I knew as a kid.

Some of the frustrations came when I started studying acting. My family said that I would never get anything here because I'm asian and should go to Hong Kong or Taiwan to be an actor. I've been acting for 7 years now, and have been doing it professionally for 4 years. It's been great! I'm no star, but who knows what the future holds.

This is getting really long. If you want to know more, I can email you if you like. I can write many, many pages on this subject.

I'm proud to say that today, I have a perfect balance between being Americanized and retaining my Asian heritage/language. I'm proud of that, because it's rare that I meet another asian who can relate.

Latez

Max
Max orgazmo83@hotmail.com Monday, August 19, 2002 at 16:22:42 (PDT)

Since we are talking about this subject,

I took Sarah to my parents' home one day just because we were passing by on the way back from NYC. Sarah flew here to Boston to see me from Switzerland and spending the weekend with me. The reaction of my Mom first time seeing her little boy took home a blonde hair, blue eye girl was halarious. She looked at Sarah up and down and that made her very uncomfortable. I could see it in Sarah's eyes. My dad was great. He stroke a conversation with her and tried to make her feel at home.

After we left for the car to drive back up to Boston, Sarah told me that at that moment while my Mom was checking her out, she was very nervous. Poor Sarah!!!

A few weeks later I had a little talk with Mom and told her that I would take home anygirl I like and I would marry her for me but not for anyone else. But Mom still wants me take home someone who would speak Vieatnamese though. Well, If I could find a WF who could speak Vietnamese then that would fullfill both my dream and my Mom's dream. :-)

Until then, the search is on.
Bostonian Monday, August 19, 2002 at 15:43:25 (PDT)

Curious,

I'm not too afraid of becoming "Americanized," but maybe that's because I was born and raised here. To me, I was born American, with Korean influences, of course, from parents. I am the first American-born in my family. (I was born in 1975, if that's relevant).

An author once said that people (particularly radical multiculturalists) too often portray assimilation only in terms of loss -- of the old country and its culture. I guess what your boyfriend meant, and I tend to agree, is that there's also something you gain by becoming "Americanized."

So what if I'm "less Korean" than someone who grew up in Korea. Someone who grew up in Korea doesn't have the opportunity to be "Irish" or "Italian" or "Mexican" for a day, or for that matter, "Japanese" or "Chinese."

Someone who grew up in Korea does not have the opportunity to make tons of non-Korean friends, like I have.

And, most importantly for this forum, someone who grew up in Korea doesn't have the same opportunity to fall in love with someone who isn't Korean.

So, in becoming "Americanized", you gain a certain richness to your life that I think you just don't have if you insist on remaining tied solely to your ethnic identity. I'm certainly proud of my Korean heritage, but it's only one part of who I am, and I think my life is far fuller for having been born and raised in America. No regrets.
JJP Monday, August 19, 2002 at 14:11:43 (PDT)

Max- ask away!
curious girl Monday, August 19, 2002 at 13:49:57 (PDT)

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