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ASIAMS.NET |
POLL & COMMENTS
ASIAN MALE/ WHITE FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated
Tuesday, Apr 1, 2008, 05:28:56 PM
to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)
This poll is closed to new input.
Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
Samantha,
Thankyou :) that is really sweet of you. Yes, my husband is from Singapore. He has many friends that live in Japan. I do feel a little bit better about myself with the maternity clothes. Some of the ones they make are really colorful and cheery. Then some of them are very drab and unflattering. I have been picking out alot of bright fun colors. You are right about the hormones. Because one minute I feel fine, then the next minute I feel depressed. I have been doing alot of swimming pool exercises in mornings. That helps a little bit too.
Hi Lotus :)
No, I'm not in Japan. I think you might have got me mixed up with another person. There was a girl on here that said she was living there. I would really love to go there when the baby is born. I have heard that its such nice place!
Samantha (Pregnant1)
Thursday, August 22, 2002 at 11:08:49 (PDT)
Sue (I'm back),
I think you need to work on being more of a challenge. I think you come off as too eager, too 'easy'. Men like to think that they worked hard to get their girl. That means you have to show him obivous signs of interest, then back off. He should extend a date offer if he is interested.
You don't need to play hard to get, be direct and frank. I think most Asian guys are shier than non-Asians, so to play hard-to-get will very easily discourage them. If you are couragesouly direct and sincere, I think he will be glad that you went out of your way to approach him. But just do it once. It's like a caffeine boost at your Starbucks -- your buying signals to him need to be nice and strong -- something that goes right to his brain and jolts him awake.
If he isn't socially incompetant or isn't a complete pussy, he should approach. I must admit, it DOES take patience with Asian men. They are culturally conditioned to be less blatant than non-Asian men. Sorry, I guess that's just the way it works.
Of course, it could be that some Asian men arent into non-Asian women, or that they just don't find YOU attractive, at least in their own individual eyes. THAT DOES NOT MEAN ITS PERSONAL, do not get discouraged.
Keep Trying... you can do it.
Thursday, August 22, 2002 at 05:18:49 (PDT)
Max,
Id say your description is pretty much spot on. WFs generally prefer men that are at least average, 5'9" or so. I'm actually 5'8" but I have a built body and good posture, so people sometimes ask me if I'm 5'10". As a guy that sometimes feels insecure about his height sometimes and thus obssesses over even 1/2 inch(just a little! what guy isn't? =)), I would def be able to tell the diff between 5'8" and 5'9"/5'10", but I have been asked this. Strange huh? But you're right about the height.
And you're also right about the accent thing. It has to be usually non-existent. An outgoing personality helps too, as does impeccable taste in clothes, food, and other hobbies.
You also have to have some beef on you. I weigh 160 pounds and I'm cut to the bone. I have a slender body structure so with all that muscle I probably resemble the sleek, shredded Brat Pitt in Fight Club (Am I flattering myself or what? =P I only wish I had a face like that good looking though... haha).
I think I qualify.
Thursday, August 22, 2002 at 05:06:49 (PDT)
Christian Guy,
Do you mind posting how you came up with the calculation results in details, and from which dating sites? I'm always interested in statistics like this. Maybe in addition to what you did, you could include the fact that blacks are 13% and Asians 3% of the population. So try to get these numbers:
"X percent of Asian men and Y percent of black men are wanted by women of all races as mentioned on their personal ads." (This probably would need an assumption that one woman can only want a max of 1 person of each race)
And you could play the variations too. Instead of "women of all races", you could break it down to "Asian women", "white women", etc.
Do this also:
"Z percent of white women are interested in Asian men, while X percent of white women are interested in black men"
Sound the same as the first one? No, it's different.
And to do it fairly for both Asians and blacks calculation, you probably have to do it using the same type of dating sites. In other words, if you use a general dating site, like match.com, as a base to calculate for Asians, then you also have to use the same match.com to calculate for blacks. You cannot use match.com for Asians and a black dating site for blacks. If you want to use a black dating site for blacks, then you must use an Asian dating site for Asians, not match.com. You got it?
But then, if you use 2 different dating sites like this, you introduce another possible error because each site may have different significant features(e.g. the Asian dating site is for general Asian population while the black site is for black doctors only. This is like comparing apples and oranges).
Using one dating site can also give an error if the site happens to be more popular to Asians than to blacks, or vice versa.
OK I stop before I confuse you or myself more. :)
Statistics is fun
Thursday, August 22, 2002 at 00:05:37 (PDT)
Hi Max,
"5'8" or taller, fairly Americanized with little or no accent"
That is a pretty astute observation! My current b/f is 5'8, considers himself to be pretty Americanized and has pretty much lost his accent (though I always thought it was cute!)
A few years ago I dated a K(C)orean-American guy who was also 5'8!, was pretty Americanized and had no accent. So I guess there may be some truth to your theory. Actually I don't see that many AM/WF couples around where I live so I can't make a guess.
What drew me to my boyfriend? Well first off I've dated all races of men, so I'm not some weird Asian fetishist. The initial attraction was physical- he has good looks, nice hair, and always looked great. His clothes are always perfectly neat and new looking, and he has a great sense of style. Also he takes great care of himself and works out. The things that really attracted me to him were just basically what a nice guy he is. He is genuine and honest and sincere and upfront. He is confident and carries himself well. He has a good sense of self-esteem without being arrogant. Also he has a great sense of humor and loves to relax and have fun and laugh. He's smart. But what makes me feel like he's "the one" is that he treats me like a princess. He is so considerate, supportive, he's a shoulder to cry on in hard times, he's my best friend, he'd do anything for me.
Long answer to a short question huh?
Anyway tell us more about yourself, are you currently dating a WF?
curious girl
Wednesday, August 21, 2002 at 16:11:00 (PDT)
Lotus wrote:
ćI noticed 'some' of you say how you find WF better looking that AF. My boyf is like that too. I will find a pic of a nice pretty AF and ask him what he thinks and he's like "whatever" or "she's ugly"... I wonder why this is. Is it because you grew up in North America/UK/Australia, etc? I know it's hard to explain... Any volunteers? 8)ä
Maybe the girl is pretty good looking for an Asian girl, but in an absolute sense, she may not be all that good looking. I think a lot of times peopleās looks are judged by comparing with others. This may or may not be race related, but I think many times it is. For example, an average looking person would appear more attractive when he/she is surrounded by lots of unattractive people. Maybe you are comparing this AF with the typical AFs youāve seen in real life, and she seems pretty.. well pretty. And your boyfriend compares her to not just other AFs, but all females, and maybe then, she isnāt so pretty anymore.
I believe beauty is not an abstract concept invented by society. There have been scientific experiements that show infants also recognize beauty in facial preference tests that align with what society considers beautiful. I, myself was not born in the US. I came to the US at around 10 from China, so I had zero exposure to American Hollywood culture, in fact I didnāt even know what white people or black people looked like. But when I started school here in the US, I have always developed a strong attraction for the pretty white girl in class. I have never felt any sort of attraction to girls when I was in China. I have always considered girls just as if they were guys, but different. In fact, I donāt even think I understood the concept of pretty until I saw white girls.
Deng Ai
Wednesday, August 21, 2002 at 15:21:12 (PDT)
uhhhh duhhhhh,
I can understand you are no rocket scientiest and I do see your point of far less asain. But can you explain why AF married out more than AM. Hmmmmm.....BTW any rocket scientist here.
We'll.. I think it is this; Guys suppose to be the one approaching the girls. But AM seems have this problem of not approaching non-asain women so it makes their chance with a non-asain female far less than AF with non-AM. Because non-asain males don't have AM's problem and will approach any women without heistation. And most of them approach AF so it is why AF might married out. So guys, go out there and do your jobs as men. Approach some beautiful girls and make them happy. B/c girls like guys approaching them.
But also b/c not to get slap too. =)
No rocket scientist either but a computer scientist!! LOL
Azn-Pride
Wednesday, August 21, 2002 at 15:09:14 (PDT)
NotConfusedAsianDude & Curious Girl,
I think the real reason some WFs look at Confused Asian Dude is that they are thinking "I can probably beat him up".
Deng Ai
Wednesday, August 21, 2002 at 15:03:13 (PDT)
uhhhh duhhhhh,
True and good point. Forget about that subject guys. Believe it or not but from what I've known it is pretty much equivalent.
equivalent
Wednesday, August 21, 2002 at 14:48:26 (PDT)
"Not Confused"--
I think you might have been a little harsh towards "Confused." True, you shouldn't take every glance as a sign of attraction. But if he's noticing that it happens pretty regularly, and that the looks are friendly, maybe they're not just spacing out. If they really had no interest, they would more likely NOT look at you, or just give you a blank stare.
It's neither sophisticated nor helpful to be overly cynical. If it'll build your confidence, go ahead and put the brighter spin on things.
JJP
Wednesday, August 21, 2002 at 14:25:51 (PDT)
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