What AF Want in a Dream AM | Asian American Poll

WHAT AA WOMEN WANT IN A DREAM AM
(Updated Tuesday, Apr 1, 2008, 05:18:52 PM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an AA female, what would be the personal style of your ideal AA man?
Reserved & Cultured | 8%
Warm & Understanding | 85%
Aggressive & Take-Charge | 7%
Party Animal | 0%

Assuming you are an AA female, what would be the body type of your ideal AA man?
Thin | 1%
Trim | 54%
Sculpted (V-shape) | 45%
Stocky/Heavyset | 0%

Assuming you are an AA female, what would be the height of your ideal AA man?
Short (5-6 or Under) | 0%
Average (5-7 to 5-9) | 51%
Tall (5-10 to 6-1) | 48%
Supertall (6-2 or Above) | 1%

This poll is closed to new input.
Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.

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WHAT YOU SAY

[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]

firesnake,

Like I mentioned earlier. Lust is the just the pre-cursor the the emotion of Love.

Of course you can choose not to let Lust develope into Love, if you so desire. Our minds allows us to override emotions if we choose.

As for your example about people fostering "horny" thoughts....we are moving into a discussion on the dynamics of relationships and away from the emotion of love.

Let's apply simple game theory. When a male female meet for the first time. We can assume each individual has a 50% chance of being attracted or unattracted to the other. Using a 2x2 grid to plot the results we see. There is a 25% chance of mutual unattraction, 25% chance of mutual attraction, and a 50% chance of unreciprocated attraction. Of course this model doesn't take into account the intensity of attraction or unattraction. But bear with me, since I'm trying to illustrate dynamics of relationship.

So 25% of the time, we don't need to talk about it since they hate each other from the outset. 50% of the time one party is using cultural display to change the other party's mind about liking them. And in 25% of the cases is where the possibility of "True Love" may occur.

So assuming you're day-dreaming about creating the beast with two back with a guy. You have the pre-cursor emotion to be in love with that individual. That individual may not be attracted to your (25% chance of female attract:male unattract). It then becomes your responsibility to utilize cultural displays to change that individual mind about you. This lead to a relationship of love between you to. Hence, Lust was the motivator to beget Love. QED.

So back to your first question:
"If lust is love, then every guy on the street who exposes himself to me, gropes me on a crowded train, and grunts lewdly at me is in love with me?"

Well these encounters fall into that 50% category, or the 25% subcategory of male attract:female unattract. These males are attempting cultural displays. But are failing in their attempts.

Do people grope in the NYC subways? I thought that only happened in Japan. I figure the chance for random voilence in the city, would keep it pretty low. I knew a beautiful korean girl in HS that would throw down in the subway if she thought someone was dissing her.

"So every guy who utters those words "I am in love with you" really just wants to have sex?"

This is another topic, under thing guys do in-between getting sex. From a guys point of view Dating, Grooming, Flirting, Earning money, etc.; are obstacles to be overcome to obtain sex. This is of course a very cynical view. But very true in the late teens to late twenty male persona. Of course some guys are looking for emotional stability and really mean it when they say it; they're called "keepers." And when the attention is unwanted their called "clingers."

As for being a young, beautiful, smart asian woman in the city. Well, it is a commodity. You will get a lot attention whether you want it or not. As you become more accustomed and comfortable with this type of attention, I'm sure you will learn to use it to your advantage.

Just remember it's not your fault you were born intelligent. It's also not your fault you've grown into a beautiful and sexy person. Assest are meant to be ulitilized not worried over.

"I just want to believe that there is more to love than some seeds of sexual chemistry. It's simple to be sexual."

There is more to love than sex. I'm just emphasizing the importance of sex in a love. When organism is achieving the rush of amphetamines, the high is very unique. A person is basically saying, "this person is the stimulus for my future highs." Not a crack pipe or a bong. But someone not entirely under your control.

Wasn't there a bio chem class in Sty that discussed the nature of alcoholism. It pointed to the fact alcoholic liver broke down alcohol into addictive by-products. That is the same thing with the amphetamines of love. The are degrees of addiction to a stimulus. And yes there are those under this model who will never experience love as we conventionally define it.
AC Dropout Friday, June 14, 2002 at 07:22:42 (PDT)

Love and attention. Why you think our sisters start to date non-AM? AF needs to be pampered and at the same time to be treated with equality.
Just An Ordinary AM in Philly Thursday, June 13, 2002 at 05:21:10 (PDT)

true love,

i don't really understand the resentment either.....i figure that as a white guy that if i drop out of the caucasian dating scene then there's no reason my place (which certainly wouldn't be at the bottom of the ladder)can't be taken by an asian guy
maxdacat Thursday, June 13, 2002 at 02:15:22 (PDT)

rare stuff --

I suppose I was born in the wrong century.

The wheel of time was invented before ancient Greek times - during the Bronze Age.

:P.

firesnake Wednesday, June 12, 2002 at 14:35:39 (PDT)

AC Dropout --

If lust is love, then every guy on the street who exposes himself to me, gropes me on a crowded train, and grunts lewdly at me is in love with me?

I find that very hard to believe.

So every guy who utters those words "I am in love with you" really just wants to have sex?

I am seriously confused. I just want to believe that there is more to love than some seeds of sexual chemistry. It's simple to be sexual. Too simple. Love isn't quite so simple as the dependence of desires to make beasts with two backs.

People have accused me of appearing too sexual when sex is honestly one of the farthest things from my mind at most times. People have blamed me for bringing on unwanted attention because of the way I look. I often feel objectified and debased.

Just because I can foster some horny thoughts in a guy does NOT mean that the random guy potentially loves me.

Does it?

firesnake Wednesday, June 12, 2002 at 11:22:06 (PDT)

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