Asian American Attitudes toward Height | Asian American Poll

AA ATTITUDE TOWARD HEIGHT
(Updated Saturday, Jun 6, 2026, 12:07:54 AM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian American, how important is height in your assessment of a person's attractiveness?
It's a key element of attractiveness. | 20%
It's one of many factors I consider. | 44%
It's less important than other personal qualities. | 28%
I am not attracted to tall people. | 8%

Assuming you are an Asian American, which best matches your feelings toward your own height?
I'd like to be 3 inches taller. | 43%
I'd like to be an inch taller. | 27%
I'm happy with my height. | 26%
I'd like to be an inch shorter. | 4%

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From my own experiences, I find AM to be very shy about approaching other females. They do not make eye contact or express themselves through body language. I wonder if it is a cultural thing where the acceptable social behavior is one of reservation...
gema Friday, May 31, 2002 at 06:54:19 (PDT)

There are AM who are outgoing and assertive. There are AM who are naturally quiet and introverted. There are AM who are players or swingers (Sweetlife). They have a WF fetish, simply love WF's or women in general, or are playing pay-back. There are AM's who love AF's but end up feeling that AF's don't like them because they see so many AF's with WM's, so they end up dating only WF's. And they don't give a damn anymore how good the reasons AF's have for dating WM's; it's too late, and they've finally learned to get as many WF's as they want since they've improved themselves so much as they've aged into their thirties. Some of them become bitter and angry and refuse to deal with women. Some of them just repress the entire issue. There are AM's who don't feel they are good enough for WF's or are too afraid of dealing with WF's in this society, so they end up greatly restricting their dating options by only going for AF's. There are many AM's who have no social rode models to show them how to interact with women, how to flirt, how to date, how to become more comfortable with things sexual. There are AM's who manage to develop great social skills despite feeling marginalized when they were younger. There are AM's who have never had any real social problems because they were naturally extremely outgoing and developed their social skills by blending into the white mainstream or hanging out with the cool Asian cliques. There are AM's who are forever lonely and no one ever notices.

The Sweetest Thing Thursday, May 30, 2002 at 21:09:28 (PDT)

To Amber and other Asian girls who believe Asian men just don't approach you:

Have you ever thought about this? It might just be you that's turning off Asian men. You state you date Whites exclusively. Perhaps Whites are the only guys you find attractive. Do you really want Asian men? I doubt it. When was the last time you hinted a signal, smiled at an Asian guy? Most of us Asian men can tell girls like you a mile away. Hence we have to desire to approach you, because simply we will approach an Asian girl who shows interest in Asian guys.

Well, lets see. Bet you think I'm some geek or loser, right? Another desperate Asian male. Let me tell you that I am NOT at all what you'd just pictured. OK? No, I would likely NEVER date you or girls like you. I'd rather date an Asian girl who shows appreciation for her race or a non-asian women. Now don't get me wrong. I love Asian women, find them more attractive than any other women. But I do have OPTIONS.

Now I could be wrong about you. But I doubt it.

It's all a matter of attitude girls. If you show respect you will receive in kind. If you want a good-looking asian guy to like you, well, you need to have a postive attitude about being asian. Asian men, especially those who's very experienced at dating (the kind that can date any girl of any race; the kind you may actually find attractive) CAN SMELL SELF-HATING HOs a mile away.

Good luck with the white guys!
An Asian Male that Might even intimidate a self-hater like you! Thursday, May 30, 2002 at 19:33:32 (PDT)

Village Idiot said:
"even when guys hit on a girl, it's her who gives the greenlight and then the guy approaches, that's why those we're rejected at the bar can't see the signals because the girl didn't want them to approach."

You are an idiot. You do the approach, then you find out if she is interested. If you wait for her signal, you would be waiting forever.

hello? Thursday, May 30, 2002 at 15:07:32 (PDT)

Amber L.

Look, as much as I hate guys that bitch like little pussies about women, I also hate women that bitch like bratty little 16 year olds about boys.

This is pretty much how your post translated in my subconscious mind:

[pouting]

"Like, I think I'm really pretty, but Asian guys never approach me."

Then in an airhead valley girl accent:

"I mean, duh, what is up with these Asian guys? Like, hullo! White guys seem to like what they see... even --godforbid, BLACK guys! Like, DUH!! I MUST be hot -- black and white guys wouldn't jock me then, RIGHT??!? I mean, is my make up on the wrong way? Is it my hair? But I just got them highlighted last week! Oh my God, like, these Asian guys are sooooo hopeless. Like, I know that I look like one stuck up ho' cuz I don't smile AT ALL and stand there in my Bebe shirt and highheels with my arms folded across my chest, but still! I mean, its not MY problem that I look like an ice-queen bitch... its the GUYS job to approach me. Meanwhile, I'm so lonely... boohoo hoo.

[tapping the pavement with her stilettos] Oh my god, what time is it? Its noon already. Time for my celery stick! Mmmmmm... what a delicious, nutritionally balanced meal! =)"

.... and on and on.

Listen. Let me venture to say that if a lot of white guys and black guys approach you all the time, its probably because they're not really that interested in you, but because they wanna hit that poontang. That's why they do the approach with such abandon; they dont care if you shoot them down. If you do shoot them down, then there's always the girl sitting behind you in the cafe, the girl standing next to you in the subway, and so on. I mean, if they get to know you in the process, all the better, right? But we all know what they're after. Even Asian guys are like that sometimes. When all you want to do is hit some supple young ass, then getting shot down aint no thang, since there is no emotional risk involved on the part of the guy. Remember, on that level, its all just a game. But a lot of Asian guys, including the ones I know personally, are quite traditional in their upbringing. They only show interest in women they see as having 'potential' (ie, a serious relationship). I guess they are more serious minded, and hence put a lot of thought into who they go for. Now, in today dating world of quickies, gratutious blowjobs, handjobs, friends with benefits, and one night stands, this method probably isnt the most effective. Aggressive guys are the most successful in getting passive girls like you to give it up. But hey, at least that saves some of us guys from getting herpes and all of the great fringe benefits of dating these days. I've had my share of wild times, and I've had my d*** sucked more times than I care to remember. But I've learned my lesson now. Sex gets boring after a while (ever heard "Tired of Sex" by Weezer? Great song. =)). I only go for confident women who know how to meet me in the middle. That means they are secure enough to lay their cards on the table even if they arent guaranteed a winning hand. I cant stand overly aggressive nymphomaniacs nor blow-up doll-like passive girls (I'd say 75% of women fall in this category) who just sit in the passenger seat and look pretty. Women have to have initiative too, and know what they want. Women these days JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY WANT, and it is VERY frustrating for men. We dont have time to deal with your problems and insecurities. If you are a mature, strong women (contrary to reality, this is what the Lifetime Channel keeps telling all of us), then deal with them on your own. I used to be really pissed off at women in general because they caused too much drama in my life because they couldnt figure out their own f***ing lives. But that is no more, since I found a great woman recently. But reading your post brought up some bad memories.

So my message to you is to just shut up and DEAL WITH YOUR problems. Can't get asian guys? Don't sit on your cute little butt and whine about it -- go out there and FIND one then!! My Chinese American woman introduced herself to me, and even called ME to ask me out. Although I find it a chore, I'm usually not against taking the risk of asking a girl out first. I dont' like it, but I see it as a necessary evil. But boy was I impressed when she asked me out! I swear, the confidence and poise she showed blew my hair right back. I used to say that I've been lucky to meet a REAL woman who knows exactly what she wants from life, but the sad truth is that real women are rare, just a real men are rare. Nothing is sexier than a woman who has the self-confidence to show me wassup. I think you could learn a lot from her.
Korean Guy happy with a Chinese girl Thursday, May 30, 2002 at 14:17:06 (PDT)

Man, this is retarded.

The height forum as disintegrated into a spat about AMs / AFs not taking the initiative to approach each other. Maybe we should move this discussion to a more appropriate forum, like the AA Gender Divide section? Take it away,Ed.

Its like that. Thursday, May 30, 2002 at 13:28:32 (PDT)

[After today's update, the non-height related comments won't be posted. --Ed]

Amber '1970', eh?

That would make you what, like 32 years old? Well, if you want an Asian man that badly, then you'd better get your ass up and look for or approach an Asian man YOURSELF. I understand that its the man's job to approach a female, but still, if I have to hear you bitch about not meeting any Asian men, then I at least expect you and other women like you to make an proactive effort in meeting some Asian men. Don't just stand there in your bebe shirts, high heels, arms crossed and cigarette in your mouth. SMILE. Wave. Flirt. Whiteboys don't have shit on us, and neither do black guys. (That wasnt a racial statement, I'm just saying that we're the ones with genuine game, we only show our interest if we mean it. I think many white guys, and a lot of black men tend to flirt just for the pleasure/thrill of it.)Otherwise, put a sock in it lady.
Your biological clock's tickin'... tick tock tick tock.... Thursday, May 30, 2002 at 13:25:33 (PDT)

be,

It could be argued that charisma is a two way street. If AF aren't receptive to AM in the first place, then charisma isn't really an issue.

But I suspect people are just venting on this board.
AC Dropout Thursday, May 30, 2002 at 12:49:24 (PDT)

All of you guys need to stop blaming AF for your lack of charisma. There are AF who are friendly, then there's those who are not. There are AF who are quiet, and there are those who are outgoing. Take your pick and stop whining! And while you're at it, learn to take some responsiblities for your actions (or lack of) for christ sake.
be Thursday, May 30, 2002 at 10:43:00 (PDT)

I think that the most important factor is none other than heart. No matter how tall or short you Am's and Af's are, heart is what truly matters. To you AM's: if you dated an AF, does it really matter how tall you are? No. Your heart is what it matters. To you AF's, don't be too selective in find an AM that is either too tall or short for you. I hope you understood what I am saying to you.
chinalova Thursday, May 30, 2002 at 10:12:49 (PDT)

just an asian girl,
I think it's really cool that you like Asian guys and that you don't care about a person's height.
aa girl Wednesday, May 29, 2002 at 21:33:21 (PDT)

I am an Asian girl (I am of Chinese descent but can pass for Filipina or Korean). I NEVER get approached by an Asian guy - whether it's in the streets, cafes or in clubs/bars.

Admittedly I am not the most approachable person in the world but why then do I get approached by whites all the time? Or get hit on by them. Even the occasional black man will hit on or approach me. But never by my own kind! Asian men just check me out & don't take action.

So consequently I end up dating white guys exclusively (for better or worse, I don't know).

Amber L. Amber1970@hotmail.com Wednesday, May 29, 2002 at 18:53:15 (PDT)

"Here's a novel idea -- smile and say hi sometimes."

thank you! as i always like to quote bill mahr from "politically incorrect" women have the power in terms of sex and relationships in this day and age. even when guys hit on a girl, it's her who gives the greenlight and then the guy approaches, that's why those we're rejected at the bar can't see the signals because the girl didn't want them to approach.
villageidiot Wednesday, May 29, 2002 at 11:48:21 (PDT)

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