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JAPANESE AMERICAN MALE/ JA FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated Tuesday, Apr 1, 2008, 04:14:14 PM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are a male of Japanese ancestry, which of the following most attracts you to females of Japanese ancestry?
Their facial features | 54%
Their physique | 4%
Their attitude and personality | 23%
Their education & cultural values | 19%

Assuming you are a male of Japanese ancestry, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with females of Japanese ancestry?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 3%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 38%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 56%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 3%
Assuming you are a female of Japanese ancestry, which of the following most attracts you to males of Japanese ancestry?
Their facial features | 47%
Their physique | 5%
Their attitude and personality | 23%
Their education & cultural values | 25%

Assuming you are a female of Japanese ancestry, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with males of Japanese ancestry?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 5%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 35%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 57%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 3%

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WHAT YOU SAY

[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
Although CM makes a valid point, i do believe that only an ignorant male or female will choose to be with someone based on their race just to "mix in". I do not think that someone would have such low respect for themselves to date/marry someone outside of their race in order to live their life trying to be someone they are not. CM did say that their are course of exceptions, referring to people who are dating/marrying interrationally out of love. But I believe it's the other way around the real course of exceptions are the people who dating/marrying someone out of self image, not the people who are dating/married w/ true feelings.
Angel    Wednesday, December 18, 2002 at 01:34:00 (PST)
jm hater...way to go. I try to like them, but they always backstab because they have a complex against foreigners or whatever. I always say, feel good about yourself, and it doesn't matter about anyone else. But the boys in Japan are like "mama's boys" that just cry and make excuses for their shortcomings.
Iudake Kuchisake    Tuesday, July 02, 2002 at 22:56:26 (PDT)
Thanks CM, I was going to post exactly thing you said. I totally agree.

JapaneseMale    Friday, June 21, 2002 at 15:09:01 (PDT)
Personally, in Japanese girls, as chauvinistic as it sounds, I find they're so sweet and girly!
alec13    Tuesday, May 21, 2002 at 03:23:24 (PDT)
I agree fully with what Quit Looking said:

"I'm a JA male and when I was younger would have loved to find a JA female to date and possibly marry. I felt that culturally we would naturally have more in common than people of different races. Unfortunately, a vast majority of JA females prefer white males. It can't be because of their looks because some of the guys that I see with JA females are really not attractive. I think it's more psychological than anything. They feel like they blend into American society better if they are with a white person. That way they don't stand out and bring attention to themselves. They are actually ashamed of being JA. They may not want to admit it but it's the truth. There are of course exceptions but for the most part it's the truth. It's too bad that they don't realize that to many men having a Japanese wife/girlfriend is a status symbol. Kind of like having a Rolex, or Mercedes. They don't respect you, they wear you."

My viewpoint: This is not only a JA phenomenon, though it is unusually common amongst JAs. Because of westernization and US education, many JAs lose their self-consciousness of their true ethnicity of being Japanese. Many JAs think they're White sometimes - especially those who know how to speak English only. Some people in this message board think that this is only the case for JFs which is untrue since it is also very true for JMs. Due to a low population of JAs compared to other Asian American populations, many JAs don't tend to meet with many JAs or pure Japanese. And because of cultural influence from living in the US for such a long time, many would gravitate towards socializing with Whites, and hence, relationships. Unfortunately, many JAs have developed psychological problems of feeling inferior being JAs, largely because of certain stereotypes and their Asian appearance compared to Whites.

I reiterate, the psychology of JAs due to US cultural influence upon one's Asian origin and enthnicity is equally comparable in other Asian Americans, and not only JAs.

I, myself, have gotten to feel this way before, being a Chinese-Americian, but I was fortunate enough to have an inter-racial awakening by moving back to my home country from the US. Alas, many do not gain the awakening by staying in the US (fortunately my JA close-friend did even though he stayed in the US).

I would hope many JAs would realise that marrying or having relationships with Whites is NOT a solution to mixing in well with the American society, as relationships are a completely different matter.
CM    Saturday, April 06, 2002 at 21:47:43 (PST)

[This post belongs in the Japanese American self-image page. A copy of this post has been moved there. --Ed]
jm hater ***

Your post doesnŐt make any sense. You said you hate Japanese males, despite the fact that you are Japanese yourself. So, if you are pure blooded Japanese from Japan, you must also hate your father and every single one of your male Japanese relatives. Quite frankly, I donŐt see how a native-born Japanese woman in Japan could have so much problems relating to at least one Japanese male in her own country. Either you must be aesthetically challenged, or somewhat disturbed on a emotional level.

Mister Eikaiwa Shark    Monday, April 01, 2002 at 14:47:47 (PST)
I am Japanese girl but not so in favor of Japanese guys. Probably because those I have gotten to know were pretty much a$$. As much people claim Japanese girls to be so materialistic and artificial, I think Japanese guys are the same. I often find Japanese guys in US nicer and more polite than those in Japan. Jap guys in Japan treat you like a shit, well it doesn't even come to the point you can have a conversation with them if they consider you not good/cute enough (physically) to them.

jm hater ***    Monday, February 25, 2002 at 14:54:47 (PST)

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