ASIAN FEMALE/ AFRICAN AMERICAN MALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most attracts you to African American males?
Their facial features | 45%
Their physique | 12%
Their attitude and personality | 32%
Their education & cultural values | 11%

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most dissuades you from relations with African American males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 13%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 64%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 23% 		Assuming you are an African American male, what most attracts you to Asian females?
Their facial features | 62%
Their physique | 13%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 10%

Assuming you are an African American male, what most dissuades you from relations with Asian females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 6%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 81%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family and friends. | 12%

To NeoKat,

I also had to decide which Asian language to study (for my International Business degree) and I wound up choosing Japanese. I chose this one because my compnay will be expanding into Japan this year and I want to be included in this project.

I have been studying the language for about 4 months and while I can read it and write it decently, it's difficult for me to speak it, the sentence structure is nearly opposite to English and I have trouble trying to "think in Japanese" when I want to say something. I know I will get better with this over time.

I have a tutor to work with and some Japanese friends and pen pals to help me, so my fears and frustrations are starting to go away.

I like that Chinese uses the same sentence structure as we do and that so many people speak it. I hope to learn at least basic Chinese someday since Taiwan is where my company will expand to next.

You have 3 alphabets to learn with Japanese (Hiragana, Katakana and Kanji) and while you only have one character system for Chinese you will have to deal with those tones and all those different Kanji.

If you can try to get a chance to look at the written forms of both languages and listen to the spoken forms of them. If either one of them appeals to you a little more (for whatever reason), that would probably be the best one to start out with.

Good Luck!
Thaihorse THAIHORSEyancy@netscape.net    Saturday, January 12, 2002 at 06:51:44 (PST)
Well, everyone, I guess:

What seems the worse pressure, dating approval from family, friends, or outside forces. My experience was that of friends and outside forces rather than family. I remember one of my girlfriends I met through her father. Her father was Chinese and he liked my personality (I guess). My parents don't care who I date either, as long as they are respectful to them and they have a good reputation. And my family has just about every type of race married into it, and besides I have Chinese blood in me going waaaay back from Jamaica. Anyways, one of my "friends" made several rather rude comments regarding our relationship and we got into a big arguement and we ceased to be friends. When you have people who try to drag you down, it's best to get away from that situation esp. when they contradict themselves (he was white and only dated black women). I have another instance when I dated this woman from Vietnam, but that is for another time. How about all of you out there? Where do you feel the pressure the most from dating, and what do you think can be done to help stop the pressures that you feel?
jamerican_me delewis7@yahoo.com    Saturday, January 12, 2002 at 06:32:00 (PST)
SAAM

First of all, although I haven't tried it, why don't you check the other areas; if you haven't noticed, I assume that you will pretty much gather similar statements as well. And unlike some, I've dated many other races with diverse lineages. I am not saying that I am an "expert" or anything, I'm just saying that I am very attracted to Asian American women based on my personal life expirence. And I'm sure that that is the opinion of most men(and women) as well. And if they declare them to be the best, then so be It. (I know I do!)

p.s.
No offence, but Isn't is the correct way to write the omission of the "o", and a apostrophe is used not a comma. But I will cease to apostrophe (in it's second sence).

peace, my acronymous friend
jamerican_me delewis7@yahoo.com    Saturday, January 12, 2002 at 06:02:14 (PST)
For all the Asian Ladies:

What BM do you think is very attractive (sports stars, movie stars etc.)and why?
NeoKat    Friday, January 11, 2002 at 07:51:21 (PST)
To Marduk:

Do you actually like the band Marduk?
I know it's off topic but anyhow..
Jorg    Thursday, January 10, 2002 at 20:57:50 (PST)
Hey Neokat,

Nice to see your reply; however, the only other advice I really have for you, is to, perhaps, talk to a few foreign language professors at a university (particularly those involved with Asian languages), they may be able to help you.

Choke dee na krab (Good luck!!) : )
Casual Dreamer    Thursday, January 10, 2002 at 18:56:58 (PST)
Casual Dreamer:

Thanks for the insight on Korean. There is a good population of Koreans where I live. I thought about Japanese because I was told Japanese has on no tonal aspects, however Chinese has it's benefits too... movies and people are everywhere to study and learn compared to Korean or Japanese. So I'm in a dilemma trying to pick an asian language to learn. The international market is out there and I feel it's in the Pacific Rim, but which one....HELP!!! :-)


NeoKat    Wednesday, January 09, 2002 at 12:57:55 (PST)
irubya,

Spoken like a gentleman. My only point was that it is illogical and a bit insulting to think that Asian women date Asian men because of external pressure. The reason that staement is so offensive is that it makes the assumption that external pressure is required to bring two same race people together because with out it the female would naturally drift to men of other races out of personal desire.
My point was that most people, outside of those forced in arranged marraige, make a personal choice to be with someone. Ultimately there is a level of personal preference involved.
You also mentioned one Korean female who stated familial pressure as her reason. But does she represent all Asian women. And you stated that most Asian women with ads on teh computer wanted Asian men or white men. Did they all state they wanted an Asian man out of parental pressure? I doubt it and if so show me which sight has these adds. It would be an equivalent statement if I said black women married black men because of parental pressure. Such a statement is wrong and implies that thier personal choice is likely different. That in truth they do not wish to marry black men.
I apologize for calling you a pea-brain. That was also wrong. I personally hope you find happiness in your romantic pursuits. I would however warn against romantic desire based in racial curiosity or an assumption on character based on race or just sex based in adventurism. I'm sounding really preachy so i'll just stop now....
Marduk    Tuesday, January 08, 2002 at 15:08:57 (PST)

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