ASIAN FEMALE/ AFRICAN AMERICAN MALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most attracts you to African American males?
Their facial features | 45%
Their physique | 12%
Their attitude and personality | 32%
Their education & cultural values | 11%

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most dissuades you from relations with African American males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 13%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 64%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 23% 		Assuming you are an African American male, what most attracts you to Asian females?
Their facial features | 62%
Their physique | 13%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 10%

Assuming you are an African American male, what most dissuades you from relations with Asian females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 6%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 81%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family and friends. | 12%

KWP:

What Thaihorse and Casual Dreamer are stating makes a lot of sense. I have had situations where I wondered if at one time in my life that women only saw one aspect of my physical attractive as the only reason why women gravitated towards me. And the steps that they're telling you to take are the same ones I used (seems funny that a man would be telling how WOMEN treated him as a trophy). If one is harping on one aspect about you and NOT interested in how you feel or you as a person like you're an abnormality.... Take they're microscope and shove it somewhere painful and twist.

NeoKat    Tuesday, February 26, 2002 at 06:08:39 (PST)
Indyy66:
One can only be respectful to those people who are first respectful of themselves. If one is weak minded enough to gerneralize about a whole group of people based on stereotype then that doesn't sound like anyone that I would be interested in relating to anyway.
man of many winters    Monday, February 25, 2002 at 08:12:27 (PST)
To: KWP,

Sorry for misinterpreting your post. Now that I can see what you are asking, I'll try to give you some of my input.

About whether or not the person you are with (African-American men), like you for you, or are just interested in you because they find you're different and exotic? From a male perspective, I'll say, as an African-American man who has dated girls of other races, one thing that I have noticed, when the person I'm with seems more interested in what I am, rather than who I am, is this kind of behavior:

(1): They make it a point to talk "excessively" and "unnecessarily" about the fact that they date people of the same race as you, for what ever reason.

(2): Love to brag to their friends and family about this person (you) from another race they are seeing (often times as if that's all there was to you --- the fact that you're from another race; or, in your case exotic and different).

(3): Love to brag to you about all the other people of your race they have dated, as if you really give a damn.

(4): If the person you're dating constantly ask you stupid questions about people whom you are unlikely to know, but they seem to feel you should know them simply because they are of the same race or heritage as you.

(5): If they, for some reason, seem to boast to you about how every person that they see of your race is physically attractive, when apparently some of them could be outstanding candidates for a research project.

(6): If they seem more interested in your culture than they are about knowing you as a person.

(7): Ironically, if they never seem to acknowledge the fact that you are truly exotic & different; especially if you obviously are (not always true, but worth looking in to). *Their silence about the issue, can sometimes speak volumes.

I'm not saying these are definite ways to tell, but if 3 or more of these situations seems to be the case, you might want to consider the notion that they may be objectifying you.
Casual Dreamer    Sunday, February 24, 2002 at 20:40:51 (PST)

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