ASIAN FEMALE/ AFRICAN AMERICAN MALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most attracts you to African American males?
Their facial features | 45%
Their physique | 12%
Their attitude and personality | 32%
Their education & cultural values | 11%

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most dissuades you from relations with African American males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 13%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 64%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 23% 		Assuming you are an African American male, what most attracts you to Asian females?
Their facial features | 62%
Their physique | 13%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 10%

Assuming you are an African American male, what most dissuades you from relations with Asian females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 6%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 81%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family and friends. | 12%

I know this is off the beaten path and if no one responds to this post I won't have a problem with it.

Tonight I went to see the Japanese psychological thriller 'Audition'. It really affected me, I was aroused, repulsed (I nearly threw up), scared and shook up all at the same time. I was impressed with the acting and disturbed by the glimpses it gave of how relationships between men and women in Japan can have awful nuances just below the surface of what they appear to be.

I was frightened of and sorry for the woman in this story. I know this sounds dumb, (but I feel this is how successful the director got his point across) but right now I would be very reluctant to pursue a relationship with a woman in a foreign country I was visiting. I have a strong interest and physical attraction for Asian women and I hope one day to be married to one. I have no worries that if I want to meet someone in Japan that eventually I will, but as a man I have never really been afraid of women, especially petite and soft-spoken Asian women. This movie made me feel something I've never felt before and I can now relate to how a woman might feel when she spends the night with a new lover for the first time.

I don't by any means now believe that all Japanese women could be beautiful psychotic killers, but I realize even more now that everything and everyone is not what it seems.

We often discuss Asia's fear of the dangerous and violent "black man", I can say that now I kind of understand how strange it feels to be afraid of someone due to "media imagery". I don't really know many Japanese women yet and I can honestly say for a few seconds after meeting someone new I will now wonder "am I seeing the real person?"

Anyway, enough of my silliness. I just wanted to share my thoughts and possibly hear other people's thoughts about this film.
Thaihorse THAIHORSEyancy@netscape.net    Sunday, May 12, 2002 at 00:00:18 (PDT)
Update!

I posted on this board waaay back when, about an ER episode where the whole Asian/Black interracial relationship thing was laid out when one of the characters got pregnant by a black guy. I remember being stunned at the resulting conversation when an Asian female friend of mine admitted that she would never date an African-American man (which I am).

Since then, I've asked more of the Asian women that I know socially (not dating) what the deal is. I found out that basically we're considered "impure" by many of them and/or their families (everyone said that it was "their families," but somehow I doubt that they were all able to slough off their ingrained stereotypes while at the same time actively supporting them by their actions).
I'm a pretty equal-opportunity dater, not really a player or anything, but I'm starting to have a pretty strong reaction to this bizarre perspective. There was actually an asian woman who was giving me signals in the gym but I quickly and automatically assumed that I was misreading them because--with very few exceptions--virtually all of the Asians I've seen, profiles on the web for internet dating, and real life examples--Black is Whack and White is Right. I remember reading a Michael Crichton novel called "Rising Sun" back in the '80s where one of the characters made the statement that "Asian cultures are some of the most racist in the world." I didn't then, but now I'm starting to believe it.

For those of you upset by reading the above, sorry. You may be the exception to the rule...but you know that to your circle of (AF) friends, more times than not, I'm right. What's even more amazing to me is the fact that it's not "I don't date black guys because I date inside my race," but it's "I don't date black guys, but white guys, mmm-boy!"

Forgive my bitterness on this subject, but I just haven't experienced such a uniform wall of racism since the Rodney King trial. If anyone has any insight as to what the hell is going on here, I'd love to hear it (preferably from AF; you BMs in here are a little too enamored for my taste, even if there wasn't a problem on their end...)...

Confused    Friday, May 10, 2002 at 23:28:26 (PDT)
Actually, I live in the Bay Area...and see many AF/BM pairings...
BM from the Bay Area    Thursday, May 09, 2002 at 12:40:18 (PDT)

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