ASIAN FEMALE/ AFRICAN AMERICAN MALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most attracts you to African American males?
Their facial features | 45%
Their physique | 12%
Their attitude and personality | 32%
Their education & cultural values | 11%

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most dissuades you from relations with African American males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 13%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 64%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 23% 		Assuming you are an African American male, what most attracts you to Asian females?
Their facial features | 62%
Their physique | 13%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 10%

Assuming you are an African American male, what most dissuades you from relations with Asian females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 6%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 81%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family and friends. | 12%

To Everyone who has replied me,

Wow. Thank you all so much for responding to me. Its been four days since the first time my mom talked with me about this issue. And yesterday, both my parents talked with me. And today. It just keeps getting worse. Their thoughts keep getting more foreign and irrational to me. They are my parents, the most rational people in the world, I have always thought. But in the recent few days, I feel as if I can't take it anymore. I feel like s***. Not only my mom but also my dad says to me that he will not accept me dating a black man. If we ever get close enough to marry, he won't accept that. How would you feel, if told at age nineteen, who hasn't even considered marriage, and if there were ANY thoughts about marriage.. they were only daydreams about a perfect wedding, ceremony, dress, laughter, etc... that "If you marry a black man, I will not accept it. In fact, I can tell you solemnly that I will NOT show to the wedding. Instead, I will completely ignore you and you can live your life however you choose and I will live in my circle." And then to go on and on about how he loves this family and how he would HATE to see the family break up like this and anyone who breaks up family is a cold heartless person. I couldn't take it anymore.

My dad says its because of the mixing of two extreme cultures and social acceptance. And he says I am too young and have so many choices ahead of me. True, I am too young and I do have alot of choices. But He is my choice for now, and he is a black man, and the only thing wrong with him is the color of his skin, in their eyes!

I love my parents, I love my family. I just couldn't believe they have told me that they would disown me. Upfront. I can't believe they told me that I can try to change their minds and tell them what is right, but they will stand strong on this issue as long as they live.

I COMPLETELY appreciate all the posts I have seen on here. I felt good, to know that there are people who understand and support me, even though they do not know who I am. I just want to say, thank you. :)

liz havefaithindestiny@hotmail.com    Thursday, July 11, 2002 at 21:08:30 (PDT)
To i like chocolate:

I have had the pleasure of writing to and talking on the phone to a young Asian lady living in Australia. We are no longer in contact but I must admit that I was very fascinated by her stories of life in OZ, and I just loved her English (UK) accent!

After talking to her I have decided that I will visit Australia someday (and for reasons that I won't mention here, the town of Wagga Wagga!) Is New Zealand similar to Australia and do you ever see African-American men there visiting for vacations or on business?

I'm glad you had a good first experience, (it sounds like you two became VERY FAST friends) and I hope you get to date more men of color in the future. Thank you for sharing with us.
Thaihorse THAIHORSEyancy@netscape.net    Thursday, July 11, 2002 at 16:49:48 (PDT)
I am an AF from New Zealand and I live in a country where we have no black males, and my experiences have always been with skinny ass white guys or Asians. Recently i had the opportuntity to visit the United States and Canada for the first time and i loved it.

I have always been interested in the black music scene ie RnB hiphop soul etc, and i found the clubs there were great. I also had my "first experience" with a black male in the back of a car, and although we didnt "finish the transaction" i am already thoroughly convinced that black guys are better lovers and are generally more experienced in the sack. Normally i would have to instruct the guy what to do but this time he did everything right :-)

Unfortunately im back in NZ but i think ive caught the chocolate fever. I dont think i can even look at another white guy ever again.

ANy contributions to this topic are welcome.
i like chocolate NZ girl    Wednesday, July 10, 2002 at 23:12:49 (PDT)
I've seen many black asian couples on tv:lucy liu and taye diggs(ally mcbeal),
ming na wen and morris chestnut(er),and wesley snipes & ming na wen(one night stand).
Eurasian Woman    Wednesday, July 10, 2002 at 02:15:36 (PDT)
GEOFFREY and PAM:
thanks for sharing your comments and experiences !!!!
THAIHORSE:
that's why I'm proud to have you for a little brother, because you're open minded and sincere and your pursuits will have the strength of your convictions to carry you thru. As you can see my partner is Asian and I happen to be fond of her culture and other Asian cultures, not because of their acceptance or perception of me, but because of my acceptance of myself and my own culture.
LIZ:
Love is the most powerful force in the universe!!!!!
Black/Asian couple (big brother)    Tuesday, July 09, 2002 at 09:49:15 (PDT)
Did anybody else catch Arliss last night? Rita hooked up with a black gourmet chef. That may be the first black/Asian coupling I've ever seen on tv, period. Guess Hollywood is finally noticing that it isn't as rare as you may think.
T.B.    Tuesday, July 09, 2002 at 08:28:29 (PDT)
To KamenHanya,

As a young black person i find your comments very offending. We have been through a lot of s*** in America and for you to even make a stupid comment like that makes you a disgrace to asian people. I simply dont understand it.
To be disliked by a race we barely understand?

To Liz,

Follow your heart and ignore stupid ignorant people like KamenHanya.
:)
A Browser    Monday, July 08, 2002 at 21:38:56 (PDT)

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