ASIAN FEMALE/ AFRICAN AMERICAN MALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most attracts you to African American males?
Their facial features | 45%
Their physique | 12%
Their attitude and personality | 32%
Their education & cultural values | 11%

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most dissuades you from relations with African American males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 13%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 64%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 23% 		Assuming you are an African American male, what most attracts you to Asian females?
Their facial features | 62%
Their physique | 13%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 10%

Assuming you are an African American male, what most dissuades you from relations with Asian females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 6%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 81%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family and friends. | 12%

Blackanese,
I must take issue with you my brother. I lived in Japan for 8 years and NOT ONCE did I encounter racism. What I did encounter was a phobia of the unknown element or the outsider.
Japanese people as a culture tend to be very socally concious. I married a Japanese woman and my friend married her best friend. Now they had a decent amount of money and they had bought him a new car and everything. But he never tried to learn more than a few words of Japanese, even tho his father in law tried to learn English to bridge the gap. The man said to me once, "I wish my son-in-law were more like you."
I was ASHAMED for my friend. And he shamed me as well because I had no influence on him. Thus I had to distance myself from him. He eventually ran off with the car and started living with some woman that would pay HIM money all the time. He made me and black men in general look bad. On the other hand, my father in law had NO problems introducing me to anyone he met or anyone in his family as his son. I met EVERYONE in the family on my wifes father's side and mother's side. That is practically unheard of.

I've gone places where the first thing they said to me was "No American!", but when I started speaking in Japanese and asking them why they had such a policy, they quickly invited me in. When you are in another country, you dont wait for them to ACCEPT you in. You have to actively REACH OUT to them. The responsibility is yours, not theirs.
Six-Ten Black Male elronin@ameritech.net    Tuesday, July 30, 2002 at 03:35:41 (PDT)
Ted, and Claire,

You know maybe I overreacted a little. And I must apologize for stereotyping myself but at the same time what you are doing is stereotyping. I got so upset because all I see is people lately bashing brothas and I don't understand why because not everyone that listens to rap and dresses in the hip hop wear is a gangster or all that negative stuff. I understand fully that the way you dress and carry yourself is important and sure I don't fit the stereotypes but when you talk about black men in general pretty much you are saying we are all no good and that we can't treat women good. True a lot don't treat women good. So you want to focus on the negative images of my people well okay. Let me tell you the negatives of Japanese guys because thet treat their women a whole lot worse than we do and the Japanese women will tell you that. But should I say all or even most when I haven't met or seen them all. I t doesn't feel good when your race is always seen as worthless. See asians will never know what it is like to be treated like that. Yeah I am a little angry but that is because it shouldn't be an issue of oh she is dating a black guy. We are not seen as just regular men but only by our skin color like it's a bad thing. And you know Claire more power to you if you could care less of being seen with a black man because a black man would probably feel the same way as you towards asian women. You have the right to choose who you want to date so no I'm not mad that you wouldn't date us. I just got upset because you choose to be ignorant because of the negative image that the white man shows on television that's all you see so instead of finding out for yourself you are brainwashed. Ask yourself how come they will never show black men when they are doing the positive things on television. But anytime something negative happens it's on the television. Walk one day in a black person's shoes and then you will truly understand what it is like and why all the anger.
blackanese    Tuesday, July 30, 2002 at 00:00:55 (PDT)
Well, I'm a black and male, and after reading many of the thoughts from black men on this site, I'm really starting to believe that us black men in general really do have very low self-esteems.

I guess it will never be acceptable for a black man to say that he is not at all attracted to Asian women, and simply leave it at that. No, there always has to be at least two dozen discussions about why they feel slighted by Asian women and why they don't recognize them. Or how they have soft delicate skin and all the other candy-reminiscient, nauseating qualities.

"Me big black man. Me like soft delicate smooth petite. No Asian woman want me. Boo hoo".

Maybe Asian women don't care, and maybe you should learn to accept that and do the same, instead of accusing them of racism when they don't want you. I believe that for better or for worse, blacks can be racist, and it's time black men become racist in the way they see other people to do.

Perhaps we will finally have some respect around the world when many of us stop acting like interracial sex predators and start to love our own women more than others.

Why must black men continue to affirm in women's minds that they (black men) are all desparate, horny losers who are jealous of the fact that there women like them who couldn't care less about them?

The ways that many black men have been idolizing and fetishizing Asian women in this forum is really disgusting, sick and saddening. I bet there are Asian men and women reading all the pathetic laments and complaints from black men, and either laughing and shaking their heads. Even the sisters do a better job when it comes to interracial dating. Damn!
Juan Philippe niceguy1771@mail.com    Monday, July 29, 2002 at 19:15:08 (PDT)
Brother Blackanese,
Man seems like everytime I come here lately you're embroiled in yet another controversy about the Japanese! If life for you is as bad as you say it is there for you in Tokoyo, then man just come back home! I'm sure if you can secure employment in Japan then you could also get a job here. You're attacking these japanese ladies in this site like a pit bull dog, but yet have a japanese girlfriend. Hmmm...? Can't figure that one out. Maybe you're upset because you can't get the kind of japanese woman that you really want there. Maybe the kind that you desire are attracted to and only dating whites guys. Whatever, you really need to chill out with all this racist chatter.
Hope you discover some peace.
Bo Bo    Monday, July 29, 2002 at 16:54:09 (PDT)
I'm sorry, but I'm getting a little tired of this "most but not all black men" negative image. It's like saying the majority of black men are bad but not all, or "some" are good.There are simply too many black men around the WORLD (and just in america) to say things like that.I remember having a lot of bad experiences with japanese women, and I was'nt even trying to have any kind of relationship with them. So far I've only had one good experience with one and we are still friends to this day.So should I belive most, but not all japanese women are not good friends or even mates? Should I judge someone by the way they dress? Should I even belive in the tired image of asian women being quiet shy,kind, exotic, and always standing by their man? There are a lot of bad black men.And asian, and white and pretty much a lot of bad men in general (and belive it or not a lot of bad women too).I'm not targeting anyone in this place. I'm just saying in order to say things like most black men are or have a bad image you at least have to know the majority of black men. But I'm sure there are people who know millions upon millions of black men around the world personally.LOL!!!
jamaican man    Monday, July 29, 2002 at 15:02:49 (PDT)
Brother Blackanese,
I'm shakng my head here because over the past few days you have posted some interesting, but narrow minded comments.
The issue that I must take up with you isn't at all to do with the Japanese, although I do think some of your comments were very personal in both it's context and content. My issue with you is that with concerns about our people. Like yourself I'm a black man and I'd just love to believe as you say that we all know just about everything of our history from for a better choice of words "From Slavery To Freedom" An excellent book by the way. But, my brother that's just not the truth! I'm not here to bash either you nor anyone else, but as applies to black history unfortunately, and you apparently disagree with this point, but most of our people don't have a clue as to the dynamics of their own historical beginings.
I viewed here recently, also over the past few days comments made by a few individuals directed at you saying that "yourself" in particular need to better research and study your own history. I personally don't know what you know of black history, but I'm telling you whether you believe it or not, most blacks don't know enough, and for the most part even care about their historical roots. I know that some black folks out there will get an attitude and really get pissed off about that statement, but again it's all true. And, that lack of knowledge of oneself is the biggest stumbling block for our people. Most may have an idea of contemporary black history perhaps since the mid thirities to the present day, the trublent 60's and the civil rights movement etc, but really not much more than that. More may know about the pre civil war days, and the days following the civil war (the Reconstuction Period) which by the way didn't really have a lot to do with us.
However, there was some "token" opportunities afforded us at that time, but not much really. But many black don't even know that "yes" we truly have a rich cultural history. We are among the few people that have 5,000 years of recorded history! However, much of that history is in the motherland (Africa). And you have to go read about it, not wait for it be made into a "made for television movie", so at that time you can again complain about how hollywood falsely protrays african americans. Most black americans don't desire to have anything to do with Africa, but somehow choose to call themselves "African Americans".
Just ask most of the brothers and sisters about going to Africa, and you'll see for yourself the answer. I've been to Africa seven times and many african peoples don't care all that much for black americans, because they say we act "too white" as it relates to our cultural values. And also they say that many black americans that come there expect other africans to roll out the red carpet for them like we're royalty returing home. However, their biggest observation about black americans is that "we're all talk". Sounds all too familiar doesn't it?
Jon    Monday, July 29, 2002 at 13:46:22 (PDT)
Clarie,
I must admit I do agree with you on most your atricle...however the statement about an articulate Black male being a minority within a minority is quite inacurrate. Obviously I consider myself articulate, and I considered of friends who happen to be African Americans to be also. Yes there are a very small percentage of African Americans who have problem with the language, manners and social skills that are making the majority look bad. The media always knows where and how to find them. I can assure you that the majority of African American males aren't what you have been seeing. Now as for the Black females who see Black male dating non blacks...there is a jealousy there. Not only is with them, but it is in all races. I am a Black man who is married to a very attractive and educated Chinese lady, and I have seen Chinese men looking directly at her and making some bad comments. I have seen black ladies doing the same to me, but we decided to ignore the ignorant. I refuse to let ignorance stand in the way of me and my family. I am very fortunate that her family love me and knows African American history and my family loves her. By the way here is a site that if anyone is interested will tell about African American invention here in America. Please don't be surprise see because America don't won't you to know. This is design to keep people separate and hating each other. Please plan love seeds.
http://www.invention- express.com/theListC.html
Jsaman    Monday, July 29, 2002 at 13:41:07 (PDT)

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