ASIAN FEMALE/ AFRICAN AMERICAN MALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most attracts you to African American males?
Their facial features | 45%
Their physique | 12%
Their attitude and personality | 32%
Their education & cultural values | 11%

Assuming you are an Asian female, what most dissuades you from relations with African American males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 13%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 64%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 23% 		Assuming you are an African American male, what most attracts you to Asian females?
Their facial features | 62%
Their physique | 13%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 10%

Assuming you are an African American male, what most dissuades you from relations with Asian females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 1%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 6%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 81%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family and friends. | 12%

Anna,
I agree there's far too much discord in here!

Yumi M.,
Glad that your relationship is going well. It's good to read something positive!

Geneva,
I can relate. Been there done that...unfortunately.

Bo Bo,
Your assessment reference the cheap shot was "dead on balls accurate". Thanks for your comments.

Six Ten Black Man,
Well, we can only hope that people will learn how to be more respectful. Stay tuned!

Ron,
Very insightful commentary!

Claire,
Stay the course my sister!
Chang    Tuesday, August 06, 2002 at 12:06:18 (PDT)
Bo Bo,
Excuse me brotha (and I use the term loosely)but I'm in the military so that's why I live in Japan and I will be here until 2005. Second of all who are you to tell me that I can't get the type of Japanese girl I want. You don't even know what I want or if I even want a Japanese girl. It just so happens that my girl is Japanese. And I admit I overreacted a bit but I don't have a problem with the Japanese it is just that Claire saw fit to point out only negative things about black men so I was just showing her that Japanese have their negative parts also. I shouldn'y have snapped but I just hate it when people always say we have a image problem because not everyone or MOST black men have a image problem but the ones that do mess it up for everyone or MOST of us. I don't think that we are attacking asian women because obviously we like asian women or we wouldn't be here but I refuse to sit here and be told that not aLL but MOST of my brothas have an image problem because we are no worse than anybody else and if you don't like black men or asian women why post here. Next time an ignorant post like that comes up I will handle it better, but please don't say stereotypical things like that and expect to get a nice reply because when I said that most asians were racist she got mad. That was to prove a point and it worked. I am glad that people like jsaman are out there because that proves to people like Claire that black men are articulate enough and just as good as anyone ekse to get a successful asian lady. And asian woman are no better than anyone else so don't think that I have a fetish.
blackanese    Monday, August 05, 2002 at 22:56:38 (PDT)
To Miss Kamiyama:

I have been reading the posts here for a while now, and feel compelled to reply to your statements. I am truly sorry that a few Black men apparently took you for all the money they can get out of and then ãsplitä.

As I see things, you cannot clap with one hand. In other words, it looks like you demonstrate some poor judgment by consistently hooking up with the wrong types of people who are apparently only after your money. The fact that the ãparasitesä in question happened to be Blacks is beside the point. The same things could have happened to you at the hands of any race.

I am a Black man who was born in Africa (in Nigeria to be exact) and I have lived here in the US since I was a teenager. I would be deeply ashamed of asking you (or anybody else for that matter) for money.

You see, I was brought up to believe that the true measure of a man lies in his ability to stand on his own two feet and provide for himself and the people who depend on him, on the basis of the sweat from his brows.

I hope your experience with a few Blacks has not soured you on us as a people. After all, every race has got its bad apples.

(PS: I have spent considerable time in several Asian countries and will try to post my experiences here as time permits)
Sam Obi    Monday, August 05, 2002 at 22:03:49 (PDT)
Anna,

please don't go. stay and share your insight.

a few days ago i offered some fun comments to get back on the positive.

i agree no one should be insulted under any circumstances.

we can be passionate about our position without bashing anyone. i hope more open dialogue will lead to better understanding and closer bonds.

being hurtful can make an enemy and being considertae can win a friend, even if you agree to disgree. we can grow together by sharing our unique perspectives.
please, love, understanding and tranquility.
very old coal b369twoo@hotmail.com    Monday, August 05, 2002 at 20:27:08 (PDT)
Anna, sorry to see you go, but I really can't blame you. I'm a black man and I too frankly am tired of reading all this negative bad mouthing, and trashing of the asian women in here who's only crime is just for expressing their opinions. And, like you say it appears to be almost a daily occurence...sad to say.
If the black men here were being attacked, like I and most others have witnessed the women are here, time and time again then you'd be hearing the loud cries of racism and about how prejudice everyone is against black males. But, even you still hear those whinings when an asian lady states that she doesn't care to date a black man (which by the way is her choice), or that perhaps she really just doesn't understand how we as black men feel, or maybe we don't understand how she feels. But how can you understand anything when you're beating someone down, or why would you care to while being beaten down? Sorry, brothers but we can't be both embroiled in a self victimization process and play the role of the oppressors at the same time. It's okay to both not understand and to diasgree with someone else's opinions, that's what constructive dialogue is for.
But, these persistent, senseless, and childish attacks only contiune to serve those that seek to suppress all peoples of color be they black or asian. And, invariably we all lose in that arena.
Bo Bo    Monday, August 05, 2002 at 14:55:53 (PDT)
See, somebody fueled this whole debate of respect from asian women and black men a while back, and now it's all on a downward spiral. Whoever made some idiot comment knows who they are, and they're happy as hell they began a "feeding of the troll", as it were. If someone has an opinion, they're entitled to it, and if you disagree you have the right to disagree with it. There should be respect from both sides, but also no limitations on opinions, from asian women or black men that wish to post here.
T.B.    Monday, August 05, 2002 at 13:52:49 (PDT)
It is hard for me to comment. I'm 36, my boyrfiend is black and he is 30. He is exciting. I am happy.
Yumi M.    Monday, August 05, 2002 at 09:27:43 (PDT)
Six Ten Black Male

I agree with your recent comments regarding needing more harmony, understanding, and most of all "respect" given in here by all participants. I would've hoped that those elements that demand respect would be just as willing to reciprocate in like manner to all.
As an asian lady I see little sense in visiting this site anymore (and this will be my last time) when I already know that there is a very high probablity that I'll come under wanton attack simply because I post my comments "just like anyone else does here". I don't attack anyone here, so why then should I be attacked, or even have the potential fear of being attacked?
This is "supposed" to be a site where both asian women and black men (I thought) were to become better informed, and help other understand, but something seems to have gone terribly wrong!
I believe that my opinion as an asian lady counts just as much as anyone else's does here. Just for the record the last time that I checked this was still the "Goldsea Asian American" website, which promotes various cross-cultural categories of asian relationships, not a site "just" for black men as many seem to now think.
Anna    Monday, August 05, 2002 at 08:43:58 (PDT)
Geneva,

have you actually had a conversation any black men in person, or attended any functions in which the majority of people were black? Chat rooms are more or less a place for cowardly people to act out their bravado fantasies, whether black, white, asian or whatever. I doubt any of those people act that way in real life, and the people they're putting down and attacking in chat rooms they probably have never and will never meet. You are definitely entitled to your opinion, but I seriously do hope other asian women don't assume the worst from chat rooms or meetings of random strangers.
T.B. Terry30001@aol.com    Sunday, August 04, 2002 at 22:33:58 (PDT)

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