Asian Male/Black Female Relationships | Asian American Poll

ASIAN MALE/ BLACK FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:39:10 AM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most attracts you to African American females?
Their facial features | 36%
Their physique | 36%
Their attitude and personality | 27%
Their education & cultural values | 1%

Assuming you are an Asian male, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with African American females?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 2%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 7%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 67%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family. | 24%

Assuming you are an African American female, which of the following most attracts you to Asian males?
Their facial features | 77%
Their physique | 4%
Their attitude and personality | 15%
Their education & cultural values | 4%

Assuming you are an African American female, which of the following most dissuades you from relations with Asian males?
I don't find them physically attractive. | 0%
I don't find their personalities and attitudes appealing. | 9%
I don't think they would find me attractive. | 78%
I'd rather not deal with the disapproval of family and friends. | 13%

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Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.

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WHAT YOU SAY

[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]

"Most look down on african people...so why proudly proclaim that you're of African descent? Makes no sense."

Pam,

Caucasians are called "Caucasians," because they come from a part of Europe by that name. Asians are called "Asians," because they come from a continent called Asia. African Americans are called African Americans, because they come from a continent called Africa. Get my drift? Hence, the terms Caucasian, Asian, and African American are terms to displace the politically charged notion of "race" with that a politically neutral notion of "geography."

Finally, the term "American" is used not only to express a difference between Asians in Asia and Asians in America (especially, American-born identities of Asian descent), but also to communicate and forge a national identity as American vs. Korean, Japanese, and Chinese (etc.). This is only natural. Many people see a significant difference between a black from Africa and a black from the U.S., and similarly many people see a significant difference between a Caucasian from the U.S. and a Caucasian from England, France, Germany, etc.

I personally find the term "black" in a similar category as "African American," but I don't see other terms, such as "negroes," "darky," etc. as being similar in tone and intent as "African American" or "black." The difference is that "negroes," "darky," etc. are politically charged.
On Verbal Virginity Thursday, August 15, 2002 at 08:49:58 (PDT)

Response to Pam;

You are certainly entitled to your opinion and I would definitely not dissuade you from your preference for using the word Black.

But as I stated in my previous post, I use the term to indicate that no matter how diluted my blood is from the original African, due to interbreeding of different cultures, I will acknowledge with pride where my original roots started from.

Moreover, it is wrong for many of us to look down on Africa, despite its many problems, because all humans originated from Africa at one point, nor can we ignore the Ancient civilizations that existed in Egypt, Nubia, and Ghana, to name a few that flourished for many millennia. Check out Henry Louis Gates, ãWonders of the African Worldä, which was also a PBS special. It gives a cursory, though interesting introduction to some of the kingdoms that existed in Africa. You may be surprised at what you find.
Anon Thursday, August 15, 2002 at 08:22:14 (PDT)

Response to Sian:

You have summarized quite well the problems that exist when one mate ignores a part of themselves in order to seem less different.

If I engaged in an interracial relationship, I could not ignore an essential part of my racial identity just to prevent or diffuse any tension that may arise due to cultural differences.

It is essential that we educate one another through understanding and compassion so that our differences appear less as a bone of contention but as a celebration that will only make the relationship, stronger, exhilarating, and colorfully alive.
Anon Thursday, August 15, 2002 at 08:06:01 (PDT)

My responses..

My question to the post seems to have drawn a lot of negative comments.

This question was only to get an understanding of what I am trying to achieve in my relationship.

As far as some people who say I have turned my back on my culture, you are wrong..dead wrong.

My boyfriend and I both say that no culture is better than the others.

I have always been involved with Big Sister/Little Sister programs in my state, contribute to my culuture thru charities, programs, and activities with children of all cultures.

As far as adopting children, I did mention that we wanted to have children of our own, and adopting children from China or any other culture is not an issue I was asking. What I wanted to know is that sometimes you can try to hard, I realized that I was and have decided that I am doing everything in my power to make sure we both have and understanding of our relationship and what we will face.

My family do not like him for one reason..because he is Asian, no other, at least that is what my family has said on several occasions. When they mock his language, his facial features, and the foods he eat. These are just bigoted reasons that I do not and will not understand.

I understand that for the ones who wrote and are writting me negative responses that you have your opinion, but to say that I have turned my back on my culture is unfair, and unless you are inside of my heart, you cannot say what I am doing or not doing.

My boyfriend and I have a very good relationship, and yes, he and I have talked about this issue. But since the world has so many other problems and issues, I will just chalk this up as a minor thing in the lives of two people who just want to be a happy, successful, couple.

Again, thanks for your comments both negative, positive, ugly, and encouraging.

Good luck to other couples on the poll.
XLee YMC19674234@aol.com Thursday, August 15, 2002 at 07:55:49 (PDT)

TO Dustin:

Many African American women shatter the debilitating stereotypes of being loud, obnoxious, unfeminine, etc. In addition, you will find that African American today may be more open to dating outside of their race, if you approach them.
Anon Thursday, August 15, 2002 at 05:37:21 (PDT)

the physique and the sexiness makes me hard
Platonik chi@hotmail.com Thursday, August 15, 2002 at 02:37:10 (PDT)

XLee,

i agree with Sian's suggestion...
adopt a chinese AND a black child, if you all can't have biological ones.

respect BOTH SIDES.
girl X Thursday, August 15, 2002 at 01:09:08 (PDT)

Namestealer posting under 'perpetual bloom':

Since you have made people have so many responses with your fake posts. Perhaps you can do everyone a big favor and reveal your REAL name so that people can respond to YOu directly. That would be the proper thing to do, instead of stealing my S/N.
perpetual bloom (orignal) Wednesday, August 14, 2002 at 16:39:14 (PDT)

Namestealing:

Someone has been posting under my S/N. I do not appreciate that whatsoever. If someone has certain comments they need to post, they should try posting them under their own individual S/N instead of stealing is not a very nice thing to do. Its also very annoying too.

Ray and everyone else:

I do not agree with that persons ideas. I have never agreed with telling people where they should post.

Whoever you are, stop namestealing.
GROW UP.
perpetual bloom (original) Wednesday, August 14, 2002 at 16:16:56 (PDT)

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