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ASIAMS.NET |
POLL & COMMENTS
ASIAN MALE/ BLACK FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated
Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 04:39:10 AM
to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)
This poll is closed to new input.
Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
I really like this guy!
Yay! You've found true...likeness thingy. I don't know, when I first met my boyfriend it was kind of easy to learn about his family and culture because I was around them all the time. The cool thing is that I come from a predominantly Muslim family, so Korean and Muslim cultures I have found have a lot in common.
Someone may hide their culture from you not out of shame or anything but purely because to them it may not be relevant. You're dating him because he's a cool person, not because he's Chinese and he's dating you because you're a rockin chick not because you're black. So if these two things come into to play as planned, there really is no need to have a cultural study. Now yes, some things about culture can arise (Playfully kicking your boyfriend in the bum in the middle of the Lotte is not cool ^.^;;) but seriously, must you know everything? Do we even know everything about our own culture?
But I digress, the point is, do what you think is best. Dating is like buying underwear, one pair may not feel like another and you generally will stick with what makes you comfortable. However if you must know about Chinese culture a little self study never hurts. About.com has whole sections devoted to it so check it out.
JTHM gloomgeisha@yahoo.com
Sunday, October 13, 2002 at 11:23:02 (PDT)
[68.49.198.79]
Sammi & browneyez
Just for the record, and "not" what Tom Brokaw reported on nightly news which isn't actually the whole truth. In that report on america being over weight, what he failed to mention was that the two groups that are the most "over weight" and at greater risks health wise are "Hispanic men and black women".
The report goes on to say that Hispanic men are on average 50-to 60lbs over weight, while black women were on average 40-50 lbs over weight. True, there are some BF's that workout and workout, but look around you there's not many that do!
Read the Report
Friday, October 11, 2002 at 21:36:42 (PDT)
[152.163.189.170]
I really like this guy!!,
It sounds to me like you need to bring these issues up with him. If he really likes you as much as you like him, he will have no problems answering your questions. If you feel he is hiding something, girl, a woman's intuition is 100 times better than being a psychic. Trust me.
Sounds to me like this guy is hiding his culture from you AND from himself. If you really dig this guy, you're probably going to have to broaden your own ideas about him. The "hip hop culture" is a bit of a superfical glue attracting you to each other. What about black culture, Asian culture (society, experiences, etc.)? What else is he interested in?
If he isn't willing to talk, he isn't worth your time.
Joy
Friday, October 11, 2002 at 19:36:41 (PDT)
[218.44.178.61]
No Fat Chix 4 Me,
Your views on fatness are fine with me, I'm slender, 5'5, and already in a happy relationship. I agree with many of your points. I just hope that you are also ok with the fact that many women, of many races, do not like Short men, just as you don't like fat women. 5'9, well you could be shorter, but you could certainly be taller, which would be more appealing to a lot a women, including myself. My AM is 5'10. That's fine; he treats me great; and I love him, but if I could add more height to him I would.
Sian BlasianLove@jazzandjava.com
Friday, October 11, 2002 at 07:51:30 (PDT)
[165.134.91.59]
I also forgot to say, I think it's cool when someone really has a deep appreciation and respect for your culture. I really like that alot. I think the respect should be mutual, and the appreciation should be for BOTH cultures. Don't you think so? But what if someone seems to be somewhat hiding their culture from you? Why would someone do that? Is there a specific reasoning behind that? I can't say if the person is like, ashamed or anything. I don't know if its really that. I just wonder why the person would keep it completely sealed,closed and quiet? What does that mean?
I really like this guy!!!
Friday, October 11, 2002 at 07:14:11 (PDT)
[64.12.96.237]
What do you ladies think of this?
I have just started talking to this Chinese guy. Hes got a very good personality and he's really attractive. He has dated black and hispanic women in his past and...well, he said something yesterday that sort of disturbed me in a way. He sent me a pic of him that I really liked. He told me immediately: "My eyes are rounder than most chinese guys, mine aren't REAL slanted"
It is interesting that he said that because "EYES" is one of the things that I find to be so incredibly beuatiful in Asian men. Their beautifully shaped-slanted-exotic eyes, I absolutely love that about them. And it felt odd that he was saying that! His eyes are very pretty, but I didn't understand why he said that to me? He seems to be very immersed in the hiphop culture. That is okay and cool. I like hiphop music just as much as I do jazz,r&b and house/techno. I would like to learn about his family and history. I am very curious and interested about it. I don't know if hes afraid or embarrassed of it or..how to ask him about it. Does anyone have any suggestions? He and I do have a really strong vibe going between us, and I absolutely love it! I would like to know more about his family and culture upbringing...but I don't want him to think I am trying to get too personally in his business. Any suggestions? Please please?
I really like this guy!!!
Friday, October 11, 2002 at 07:08:25 (PDT)
[64.12.96.237]
No Fat Chix 4 Me,
Yes you were being very racist. I do not represent all Black women, but I am slender, I work out at the gym and eat healthy, as well as go to college full time. This may be a surprise to you, but there are many other Black women out there like me; and until you have met every Black woman in the U.S. you shouldn't make such generalizations, it is very ignorant.
"When you assume things we make an ASS out of U and ME"
browneyez brown_betty_eyes@hotmail.com
Friday, October 11, 2002 at 03:14:38 (PDT)
[66.42.119.126]
Retepasp, you like Amerie!?!?! You do know that she's half Korean, don't you? She's a great example of how well Blacks & Asians can mix, ne? Kinda gives you something to think about, doesn't it (ha ha ha)? About the AM/WF thing, I think that I've been in "America's Heartland" too long!
No Fat Chix 4 Me, you're kinda funny to me. I don't feel offended (but I do need to do an hour around the block, myself). It's scary to know that over half of ALL Americans (of all races) are overweight or obese. After hearing the stats from Tom Brokaw, physical attraction doesn't seem that important anymore. It's really all about health, now. One question, though. You say that a woman 5'5 should be 130lbs. What about muscle? It's more compact & dense than fat, right?
Sammi
Thursday, October 10, 2002 at 21:13:37 (PDT)
[64.216.218.125]
Sammi,
I haven¢´t really dated any blacks because there weren¢´t that many in my school. Guys that date WF just because they want to be seen with whites are just losers with low self-esteem. And yes, I¢´ve been attracted to 2 black girls but the last one I met (and really gorgeous by the way) was the last day before I left the States. I don¢´t know how it is for other guys but in my case I don¢´t have ethnicity on my list. This might sound a bit shallow but the first thing I look at is physique and then I go for personality. That¢´s all that matters to me.
By the way, I haven¢´t seen any asian guys saying that they don¢´t find BFs attractive yet.
K
Thursday, October 10, 2002 at 20:22:53 (PDT)
[196.40.43.75]
Heyla!
I haven't posted here in a while but I figure I might as well since...I haven't. Now, me personally, I think girls with a little extra meat on them are a whole lot more sexy than some anorexic looking twig. Serioualy...if I wanted to have sex with a twig, there are plenty of trees here in Virginia. Just reach out of the window and pluck one.
No Fat Chix, your comments aren't racist, you're just being a guy. Almost all guys think this way so it's not like I can fault you for that.
However, how about I do the same thing;
I don't like skinny asian men. I mean, it's one thing to be trim, but to be so skinny that I can pick you up and throw you somewhere is just plain nasty. I also don't like those extreme pretty boys. Serioualy...if you own more hair gel than me, there is a problem.
Peh...that's just me. What do I know? I just nail rabbits to a wall for a living.
JTHM gloomgeisha@yahoo.com
Thursday, October 10, 2002 at 15:46:51 (PDT)
[68.49.198.79]
No Fat Chix 4 Me, is right. There are many Asian men like him that generalize all black and mixed black women as being fat and overweight women. Most of them want toothpicky skinny girls, with their bones sticking out where hips should be. I lived in Puerto Rico for 10 years and found the men there prefer women who are slim, but have soft rounded hips and big chests. They said it was sexy and feminine. I think different cultures see different things. I am 5'6(5'8 with heels) and I weigh 131. I was not at all considered as being a fat and overweight woman. So I think standards of beauty varies depending on the individual person and how they were raised in their family. It also depends upon individual taste. I also lived in the Philipines and in Argentina for 4 years and was also not considered fat and overweight. Don't get me wrong, they like women slimlike but they like women with hips and asses. Most of the men in these places I have travelled and lived plainly stated that women that were too too skinny,pale and washed out looked like men or sickly.
(I made an error on the other post editors. sorry)
around the world
Thursday, October 10, 2002 at 10:30:04 (PDT)
[152.163.189.170]
Sammi,
I have no problem with women of color as long as they are SLIM. I can't stress that enough. I'm 5'9" and a very lean 160 pounds. I don't want a tub of lard walking next to me, I'm truly sorry if that sounds harsh. I had a huge crush on a black woman who was thin, beautiful and graceful, but she didn't like me back, but oh well... that's how it goes.
No offense, but at least half of the black women I see in America are quite overweight. About a quarter are seriously fat... I know one half white half black girl that's 5'5" and looks about 175. She doesn't have rolls or anything, but she has a really large ass, where she carries most of her weight. She wont tell me how much she weighs, but that is really nasty. A woman that's 5'5" should weigh no more than 130. 5'7" should weigh no more than 140, and 5'9" no more than 150. And even that is pushing the limits for me. I'd prefer most women at the aforementioned heights to weigh 5 to 10 pounds less than what I mentioned above. That is just MY standard. My preferences have nothing to do with race or status or skin color.
I've seen some black women that were slender and so, SO sexy it hurt just to look at them. To me, a sexy woman is sexy, but a fat woman is just fat. Fat is unattractive. And that's how it is for this Asian man.
Here's my take on why a sig. number of black women are overweight.
First of all, ALL Americans are fat. A recent study showed that over ONE THIRD of Americans are seriously overweight. Man...
Second, many black Americans are working class people. They odn't have the luxury of joining gyms or eating healthy all the time. This can affect one's weight and overall fitness.
Third, black women just seem to have naturally bigger builds that other women.
Fourth, traditional Afro-american cuisine isn't exactly healthy or low in calories. I'm not say that every single black woman in America like fried chicken and candied yams, but hey whatever.
I realize that these are generalizations, but there is a grain of truth in what I say. I honestly don't believe I am being racist or anything. Blunt perhaps. And if I do offend, please forgive me. Thanks.
No Fat Chix 4 Me
Wednesday, October 09, 2002 at 19:23:44 (PDT)
[128.253.186.46]
As a young asian male, vietnamese to be exact, I find alot of black females very attractive! Honestly I find all kinds of women attractive whether black, white, latin,asian, or middle eastern. Not all asian men have "fetishes" for blonde white girls! I personally love hip hop and r&b and find Ashanti and Amerie very sexy. I definately think that asian men are opening up more to women of different ethnic backgrounds. I see asian guys talking with black girls and vice versa quite often.
Retepasp
Wednesday, October 09, 2002 at 13:07:09 (PDT)
[64.24.17.113]
There are alot of asian males her in Northern Virginia and in the Maryland suburbs. FINE looking ones too. I've never really ever seen an unattractive asian male. My fiancee is Chinese born in Hong Kong. I think more B/f should let their feelings be known. Who knows you might get lucky. If there are AM who prefer WF then let them, thats what makes them happy (or they think it will make them happy) I'd tell them good luck baby, there are alot more where he came from.
This site is for the Black females of all shades to get together and get to know Asian men who love the sweet taste of chocolate;}
Farah Nooraljnuub@hotmail.com
Wednesday, October 09, 2002 at 09:43:12 (PDT)
[164.82.144.3]
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