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ASIAMS.NET |
POLL & COMMENTS
ASIAN MALE/ BLACK FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated
Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 04:39:10 AM
to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)
This poll is closed to new input.
Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
When people say -
""I like AM because they are so""-
I think it's sorta generalizing. I think for those of us who are in interracial relationships with AM, its different. We feel that it must be all AM who are so wonderful or so terrible, because of who we are with. I could easily say that every AM is a total hottie, and base it off of-because that is how I feel about my bf. I realize that not every single AM on this planet is a hottie. I think we tend to base our generalizations specifically from our own experiences. And some of us look at that as if it were written in stone.
Drew
Wednesday, November 13, 2002 at 03:50:02 (PST)
[64.12.96.237]
This is a cool and unique site!
I did not expect to fall in love with an AM. I guess I was alot of BFs who thought AM-BF pairing is unlikely. I had seen alot of AM that I thought were attractive, but never gave it a second thought really. It never crossed my mind. Now that he and I are together, we can't even remember in intricate detail how these strong feelings happened or came about. I mean, we remember how we met of course. And we remember our very first date in detail. Its just the changes in our feelings at some point, that sort of rising that we cannot quite figure. I guess spending so much time together over a period of time, we grew attached more and more. There is an unexplained deep attraction between us. I have tried to figure it out, and he seems to be just as puzzled with it.
Kala
Tuesday, November 12, 2002 at 07:55:27 (PST)
[152.163.189.170]
My bad...
I called her the next day only because we planned to chill that day, plus I was leaving town that same day, and she knew this...so I guess in a certain light I had to call her, but if anything materialized with her, it would be a long distance thing and you know how that goes.
Another Azn,
Well I don't know how you operate, but a night of bomb conversation counts in my book.
Good lucking out peoples.
Azn
Tuesday, November 12, 2002 at 00:26:06 (PST)
[152.163.189.170]
PriyA, aka Vijay, AZN, Batchu Praveen
First of all, I know you are NOT a Black female, but a Desi male.
Second, I found it appalling that you
tried to use "Ebonics" coupled with the use of very poor grammar when imitating a Black woman.
Third, I see Indian/Pakistani man/Black woman couples quite frequently, but I see the offspring of this coupling even more.
Last, if you are attracted to Black women, then you should actually try to approach the one(s) that you like & talk to her. Black women are very warm & open and should be treated with RESPECT and DIGNITY just like you would treat a woman of any other "race".
NY Spice
Sunday, November 10, 2002 at 04:13:47 (PST)
[24.184.66.47]
AZN
From a female's POV calling the next day was probably not a smart move. I would definetly wait awhile and casually call back later. If she felt the same thing that you did, she'll come around. Are you sure she doesn't have a boyfriend?
crystal clear
Friday, November 08, 2002 at 17:30:57 (PST)
[4.40.146.215]
AZN,
"... for the one night we shared?"
Wtf? Did you sleep with her? If not, I'm afraid you din't share jack, bub. Sorry.
But anyway, I'd hate to leave you hanging so let me give you some more constructive comments. If you called her the very next day, then you played the game wrong. Read the instructions again: DON'T BE SO DESPERATE. Wait a week, then try again. Live your life, do what you gotta do, then get back to her. Women can sense when men are desperate. Good luck.
Another Azn
Friday, November 08, 2002 at 02:45:53 (PST)
[128.253.186.46]
hey
i just wanna address -status of Black women/Asian Men relationship, focusing on Indian/Pakistani men.
im a black female and have quite alot of Pakistani friends especially, but ive never dated one. now in general it seems that South Asian people focus highly on education and things like that,nothing wrong with that certainly. Perhaps they think that alot of black people don't, but this can be quite mistaken,not from ignorance, maybe just from lack of contact i guess. it seems theres this whole 'thing' with desis about being light,especially for women. Is a woman more attractive if shes lighter or goree or whatever, cuz i dont see 2 many indian/pak men with black women.
maybe black women aernt open to dating these particular men due to such cultural differences and religion also, also black women are percieved as being 'uppity' and all that.
I personally enjoy the company of pakistanis and i guess most people wouldnt look at me and figure that i know anything about the culture or urdu language ,but i do. in general ( not that i could in any way speak for everyone) i just find them to be driven, warm, good hearted people.
maybe some indian/pakistanis feel that having a black woman on their arm is quite taboo. im not saying that all non black minorities here choose to imitate whites, but lets face it, i guess since this is a white mans country it seems a step 'up' in some peoples eyes.
this is interesting to me cuz i never see these particular races together really, and i was wondering why.
iv'e been pretty open and 'am' open to the idea of dating south asian men, i just find them attractive, not only because of the physical features, but i guess the drive that they have. maybe the 2 are worlds apart, well whatever it is i was hooked.
don't get me wrong.. maintaining culture is wonderful, theres certainly something to be said for being able to know who u 'are'and being able to know ur roots, but we should be more open to each other on the race issue, we shouldnt let stereotypes and ignorance keep any of us from meeting wonderful friends and perhaps even finding love.
as they say dil to pagal hai :D
PriyA amfene@aol.com
Thursday, November 07, 2002 at 20:56:50 (PST)
[152.163.189.170]
I'm a single Asian male, not looking for love, but will take it if it finds me.
I hooked in with a fly Black Female. From the second our paths crossed, instant rapport. I don't usually step to females but this one was just that fine. She had smooth creamy skin, long hair, bright smile, just gorgeous. She told me that she was drawn to me from the moment I walked in. We sat and sipped on a couple of drinks, and talked for hours, looking into each others eyes, prolonged glances, smiling, and finally a sweet kiss. She gave me her number and made me repeat it to her several times during the evening, telling me to call her. We made tentative plans to chill, and I called her the next day, it was a real number gladly. But she didn't pick up and didn't call me back. I'm diggin her, but I don't know what to think now. I called again, but no answer. Its been two days.
Should I wait for her to call or just be happy for the one night we shared?
AZN
Tuesday, November 05, 2002 at 00:07:29 (PST)
[152.163.189.170]
Deeper Values??
I hope yopu didn't think you were going to get by with that one. How insulting. Generalizing a people, and obviously you have not come into contact with black families. It would be unfair of me to make such a closed minded opinion of Indian culture now wouldn't it?
Do yourself and others on this poll a favor, learn about the African-American culture ( and rap music and clubbing is not the way) open your mind then come back to the poll. There are enough ignorant off the wall opinions out there I don't want you to be another one.
Not a sermon just a suggestion!
Farah Nooraljnuub@hotmail.com
Monday, November 04, 2002 at 05:46:37 (PST)
[68.50.177.32]
Batchu
I dont think black women hate Indians but do hate Indians like you.
"have deeper values".
From other topic it is clear that you think Indian culture is the most advanced and have the deeper values than others.
Do you seriously think other people would agree with you on that. I for one dont.
Jae JUN
Saturday, November 02, 2002 at 15:47:01 (PST)
[211.28.96.8]
This poll is absolutely correct. In high school there was an asian guy who liked me, and I liked him, but we never told each other because we thought one didn't like the other.
BF who likes AM
Saturday, November 02, 2002 at 15:40:18 (PST)
[68.3.5.119]
i am a sociology major at my school and its interesting to see the differences and similarities in the polls. It's amazing that both asian males and african american females ranked high in the percentage of not thinking someone from the other ethnicity would find them attractive." i think asian guys are attractive, but the way that they are portrayed and stereotyped is not really supportive of that statement.
Bren ebonydiva82@hotmail.com
Saturday, November 02, 2002 at 13:17:08 (PST)
[63.107.36.23]
Batchu,
Oh, dear. Here you go again. The second you sound like you are about to say something sensible, you mess it up with something incredibly ignorant.
I am sorry, but I do not want to be anyone's "fantasy". I hope the men I date are attracted to what is between my two ears and not to the way I look. (I am an idealist)
You obviously don't know too much about black culture to say Indian culture has stronger, deeper values. Read a few books about African American culture first and then come back to this site and comment. Wait a minute, you obviously don't know too much about the world to say that.
Who says you are seen as more intelligent and successful? That is simply a matter of opinion, isn't it? Not fact. I can name 100 intelligent and successful black people, but I can't name too many intelligent and successful Indian people. Not because there aren't any. I know there are many, it's just that I am not familiar with Indian society, so I can't, yet I do not make these uneducated, sweeping generalizations about Indian people. Again, why don't you do some research and then get back to this forum with something semi-intelligent to say.
By the way, if you don't think black women are interested in Indian men, why don't YOU approach US?
Joy
Friday, November 01, 2002 at 22:38:07 (PST)
[218.44.178.57]
I think Asian Men who are basically raised in the united states, seem to be more open to dating BFs. They seem to be more free minded to a serious relationsip and with prospects of marriage and commitment...at least this has been my experience. I think FOBs are cute and very sexy. You can fall in so in love with them, and when you do? If you are not careful? Without even realizing, it hits you so freakin HARD! I SWEAR! It is hard as hell to have a serious relationship with one. I don't mean to generalize, but it is true. Honestly. My FOB boyfriend and I have been breaking/getting back together/breaking up/getting back together/we broke up/now we are getting back together again!Damn! Its no joke. When he and I fight? We fight real hard&love real hard and it goes back and forth. This has been going on with us for a couple of years now. Yes, he can be a real complete A$$ at times. But hey, I admit that I sometimes intentionally get under his skin. I love him deep.
minku
Friday, November 01, 2002 at 09:44:07 (PST)
[64.12.96.237]
Batchu,
My darling. I have never once met a black woman who has not pointed out at least 5 Indian men whom she though rocked the Earth, moon, and stars abound, however, we are also highly aware of the "Caste System" that is also prevelant amongst the "warmth" of your culture. Tell me, were it the same with my people, (The African American population) and in a way it is, would you really want to put yourself in a space where you may not be accepted? While it is nice to share your sentiments, I think first you must consider this rational point.
Also, how can you know that Indian culture had stronger deeper values if you've never dated an African American woman?
::Ooooh you make such a cute couple!::
Everytime I heard this from anyone, I'd grit my teeth and attempt to not lunge forward and plant them into said offenders neck. When I dated white, black, or even hispanic men I never got complemented purely on how "cute" my boyfriend and I looked together, but with Asian men I'm now "cute", "adorable", "precious", and yes even "Wow, it's just like Jet Li and Aliyah" (I don't know how to spell her name and I don't care either.)
My exes and I never found it pleasant because not only would they make the comment, they would then linger and stare as if we were expected to do tricks next. (Mayvbe it's only a DC thing.)
Pfft. People are just people and people are inherently stupid and that's my final word.
JTHM gloomgeisha@yahoo.com
Friday, November 01, 2002 at 06:30:00 (PST)
[207.154.16.155]
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