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POLL & COMMENTS
ASIAN MALE/ BLACK FEMALE RELATIONSHIPS
(Updated
Tuesday, Apr 1, 2008, 05:31:02 PM
to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)
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WHAT YOU SAY
[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]
just curious
Late on answering you but I am in an AM/BF relationship. We live in LA and have been together for 5 months and wouldn't trade each other for anything!! What else would you like to know?
Reply to Just Curious
Thursday, November 21, 2002 at 23:40:26 (PST)
[63.233.25.153]
Micaela,
There are Asian Men who are attracted to us. Its really just a matter of finding that right person. I noticed that when I went out with my bf, many AM were like,"Hm. Okay, thats possible" as if to say, maybe that could actually work. I think some Asian Men may not have considered it really. Seeing it with their own eyes, then it becomes more of a reality that makes it seem more of a possibility. I did notice at a particular place that I visited there were mostly Asian Men with Asian Women. The only interracial couples I did actually see was Black/White etc.
dating an AM
Thursday, November 21, 2002 at 21:52:03 (PST)
[64.12.96.237]
Farah,
I'd love to share experiences concerning our future Asian mother-n-laws. I have a feeling our experiences have been similar. If you'd like to swap stories, please e-mail. Also sounds like we're in the same boat as far as being such a rare couple in our cities...
Sian BlasianLove@jazzandjava.com
Thursday, November 21, 2002 at 13:28:13 (PST)
[165.134.91.59]
However, on that note I commend you for being honest with your weight. That is very brave, especially for a woman.
Just telling the truth...
Wednesday, November 20, 2002 at 22:25:20 (PST)
[128.253.186.46]
trueblk woman,
lady, it's not the size of a woman's butt or their hips that some men complain about. If you got a itty-bitty waist and a flat stomach AND a nice A$$, then holy s***, I'm yours! For reals...
Really, it's not just black women... it's also white girls, latinas. Most American women who describe their bodies as "hourglass" or "voluptuous" usually have guts too. You're not gonna deny that, are you? Come on. People are always bending the truth. I wish people would be more honest. I am exactly 5'9" (175.5 centimeters) , and I always see guys EXACTLY my height say that they're 5'10", or even 5'11". Especially white and black dudes. They are full of it. Everyone is. They're so insecure that they have to fudge up their vital stats to somehow look appealing to the opposite sex (at least in their minds).
I LIKE big asses, just don't have a gut that's just as big or get rolls on your sides. Bleck.
Just telling the truth...
Wednesday, November 20, 2002 at 22:24:32 (PST)
[128.253.186.46]
I'm attracted to Asian guys but it doesn't seem like they're that open to AA women.. it's like they prefer their own kind (can't blame them, everybody's biased)
MicaelaJiminez
Wednesday, November 20, 2002 at 19:53:04 (PST)
[65.95.178.144]
Just Curious
My fiance and I have been together for three years. I met him at work. We were friends before we started dating. He is from Hong Kong. It's been wonderful, I really feel like I have found my soulmate. We've been patient with each other, the biggest obstacle was his mother, but that was to be expected. His brothers and sisters are cool though, they've been great and very supportive and thats made me feel great and apart of the family.
We live in Maryland, you don't see our combination much. I want to see how many couples like us there are in Maryland, DC or Virginia.
Farah
Wednesday, November 20, 2002 at 07:50:52 (PST)
[68.50.177.32]
AZN
I know I'm a little late on giving you some advice on this but I just saw your post. I think you should definitely try calling her once more. I know from personal experience that sometimes when a guy calls and leaves a message, I can't always make it out or the number gets cut off or I write it down then lose it. Once you actually talk to her then she doesn't call back, I'd forget about it. But if she took the trouble to give you the right number, she was obviously at least somewhat interested plus she wouldn't have asked you to keep repeating it if she wasn't interested.
Give her a chance!!
Monday, November 18, 2002 at 22:49:13 (PST)
[63.233.31.234]
The first intelligent post I've seen on this forum in a long time. Men are men, we have preferences but there is no reason to generalize based on a couple of experiences.
When people say -
""I like AM because they are so""-
I think it's sorta generalizing. I think for those of us who are in interracial relationships with AM, its different. We feel that it must be all AM who are so wonderful or so terrible, because of who we are with. I could easily say that every AM is a total hottie, and base it off of-because that is how I feel about my bf. I realize that not every single AM on this planet is a hottie. I think we tend to base our generalizations specifically from our own experiences. And some of us look at that as if it were written in stone.
Drew Wednesday, November 13, 2002 at 03:50:02 (PST) [64.12.96.237]
Islandtea
Monday, November 18, 2002 at 19:56:42 (PST)
[207.233.74.30]
How many people here are in AM/BF relationship?
If so how long...how did you meet?
Where do you live?
just curious
Monday, November 18, 2002 at 19:08:02 (PST)
[4.40.146.215]
Hey..Black American Female,
If you know the feeling is mutual with this guy that's a good sign I would go for it. That doesn't mean rush into anything but let your feelings be known and get to know each other on a dating tip if you get what i'm sayin, if anything you will expand your knowlege and ability to appreciate someone who has a different culture. It can give a potential relationship something interesting to build on. Don't be scared, you don't have to marry him and you don't have to tolerate any derogatory remarks from others either.
Sometimes when people are too similar you get bored. Imagine you started dating some one who was "safe" so you didn't risk being hurt, yet everytime you are with the guy you feel no spark. If you really like this guy take that risk, if for some unfortunate reason it doesn't work out at least you will have an experience. As I wrote previously, I had a relationship with an AM that ended sadly but I still have fond memories. Who knows what could happen tommorrow...have fun. Give an update on what happens and good luck.
Miss B
Monday, November 18, 2002 at 09:09:02 (PST)
[195.166.17.214]
Black American Female
Go for it Girl, you never know what you'll be missing. I was real scared at first too, but my fiance and I really liked each other and we support each other.
Nothing ventured nothing gained!
Peace
Farah
Sunday, November 17, 2002 at 18:51:25 (PST)
[68.50.177.32]
I am attracted to an older Asian male, and he has made it clear that he is attracted to me. But, I am not sure if I want to deal with the hassles of cultural misunderstandings.
Black American female
Saturday, November 16, 2002 at 17:41:36 (PST)
[64.12.96.237]
No Fat Chix 4 Me
The average American woman is between 5'2-5'4 and weighs 145 pounds, and wears a size 12. This would result in a very voluptuous look, not like the models one sees on television.
If you have a preference on weight, that's fine, but many women naturally are bigger, and that's a fact. You should not make a woman feel bad because she naturally has an hour-glass figure. That is equivalent to a woman making fun of the size of a man's penis.
I myself currently am 5'2 and weigh 158... going by the media and your definition I'm overweight. Oh well. It matters what the men in real life say, and I've had many Asian men compliment me on my frame. And the thing about it, no matter how much I weigh, I always have the hour-glass figure, and a bigger rump. Even at 115 I still had this figure. And, if you don't like a woman with a big behind, don't date black women, because that's how God made many of them, no matter how much they weigh!!! I in fact found your comment to be beyond offensive, but just downright racist.
Anyway, although I am currently dieting, and enjoy the feeling of accomplishment of losing weight, I have to accept the fact that I will never have a skinny 'spoon' shape that is promoted on the media. Man, my body seems to adjust around 145.... no matter what or how I eat, it is very hard to get lower than that. And at this weight, my body looks like Marylin Monroe's... big hips, thighs, and buttocks.
But yes, I do agree with some of the posters on here that many of the Asian men responding on this forum want an unrealistic black beauty, perhaps because if the black woman is the smartest and the prettiest of the black race,it is not as 'bad' dating her. It is refreshing to see Asian male/ black female couples like myself & my bf, and another couple I saw one time, where the woman is average and normal.
If any Asian man considers dating black women, he should view her in the same light as an Asian or white woman. If an average, everyday-looking Asian or white woman suites his fancy, then the same should apply for black women!!!
true blkwoman
Friday, November 15, 2002 at 10:45:04 (PST)
[65.123.29.2]
Doll...
You're in DC? Im in DC also. It's funny. I didn't think black women liked asian dudes.
xxxTimbsxxx xxxTimbsxxx@hotmail.com
Friday, November 15, 2002 at 10:22:00 (PST)
[140.147.45.70]
Are there any Asian guys interested in getting to know any B/F in the Washington DC area ? Let a sister hear from you.
Peace
Doll
Thursday, November 14, 2002 at 17:18:56 (PST)
[68.50.177.32]
I agreed for a long time with the idea that Bf/AM relationships were a big taboo. I live in the UK and here it's is very common for black males to date Asian females?? but you rarely see the opposite.
I've always been attracted to AM as well as BM. I only ever sort of admired the AM I liked from afar, growing up I always seemed to have Asian guy friends who were interested in me but I never really gave it a thought 'cos I just didn't know what to expect.
I met a guy last year who is of Indian decent it was one of those 'love at first' sight things AND HE HAD THE GUTS TO APPROACH ME but the problem I found was that he was very secretive about himself until he let me know that his family were prejudice and wanted him to marry a girl from his own race. Long story short, we parted as he was FORCED to marry! and it made me bitter as I felt I was not good enough and he was with a women he didn't want to be with.
It has not put me off AM but I can understand why the BF/AM relationship is rare, he wasn't prepared to risk being an outcast in his family for me and why should he have to choose? There are cultural, religious and financial reasons why blacks are rarely if ever fully accepted into this particular race whether we want to accept it or not.
MissB Babsmix@hotmail.com
Thursday, November 14, 2002 at 10:23:26 (PST)
[195.166.17.214]
When people say -
""I like AM because they are so""-
I think it's sorta generalizing. I think for those of us who are in interracial relationships with AM, its different. We feel that it must be all AM who are so wonderful or so terrible, because of who we are with. I could easily say that every AM is a total hottie, and base it off of-because that is how I feel about my bf. I realize that not every single AM on this planet is a hottie. I think we tend to base our generalizations specifically from our own experiences. And some of us look at that as if it were written in stone.
Drew
Wednesday, November 13, 2002 at 03:50:02 (PST)
[64.12.96.237]
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