Annoyances of Asian American Life | Asian American Poll

ANNOYANCES OF
ASIAN AMERICAN LIFE
(Updated Tuesday, Apr 1, 2008, 05:25:50 PM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Which of the following is the most annoying occurrence to which Asian Americans are routinely subjected?
Being told you speak English well | 21%
Being asked where you're from, originally | 28%
Having (non-Asian) strangers address you with phrases in Asian languages | 23%
Being subjected to offensive media portrayals of Asians | 28%

Which of the following is the most common way in which racial hostility has been expressed toward you?
Hostile words spoken to your face | 9%
Hostile remarks to others within earshot | 41%
Slurs or taunts shouted from a distance | 17%
Spreading of malicious gossip about you | 6%
Pointedly excluding you from a conversation or event | 27%

In your experience what types of persons are most likely to show hostility toward Asians?
People with low educational levels | 24%
People from social backwaters | 17%
People insecure about their own places in society | 28%
People envious of Asian success | 11%
People with little contact with other ethnicities | 19%

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WHAT YOU SAY

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To Chinalova,
I am glad you have a place to vent your anger, it is still good that there are places you can have honest and open conversations about opinions, but the flip side to that is that it also gives everyone a place to try to educate each other and explore where these opinons come from , express hurt from them and find out how and why they exist.

It is fine that you may prefer mono-racial dating for yourself, by all means, that is your right and your feelings from your postings. But my husband is Asian and I am Caucasian, and he has the upmost respect for Asian women. The good majority of our closest friends are Asian women, and most of his past girlfriends before we were married are also Asian women.
He did not marry me because I was white, and he thought I was somehow better than an Asian woman. that is ridiculous. It just happened that as a PERSON, we happened to love each other for all of the reasons that any couple gets together. Personality, attraction, sense of humor, LOVE.
To think that an Asian man that loves a woman that is Caucasian or other non-Asian race thinks that Asian women are lesser, is a blanket statement that is making alot of assumptions.Like anything, their are exceptions. Many of these assumptions are untrue.
Rare stuff: taking pride in who you are and culture is great, but lumping white people into a pool of "THEY" will have to accept our behavior standards sooner or later" sounds like the same thing that certain racist Caucasian hate groups spout. That "They" will do what is necessary to insure the white population stays in the majority. Are we not tired of this thinking now? It sounds like a Nazi bredding campaign. There is a reverse side to everything. So you think that perhaps by me inter-marrying and having a half Asian child that I am somehow championing your race while destroying mine? That is what it sounds like. Maybe you have bitterness because your mother married a Caucasian man. I hope your interactions with other Caucasian people are positive for you so you can see that just as when an Asian person is rude to me, it does not mean that all Asian people are rude and hate me because I am white.
And how does being politically correct equate with being white-washed? Finding terms that are more sensitive to people and being aware of humanity does not seem bad to me. The biggest downside of political correctness to me personally is that it can squelch open conversations at times.
And to "Revenge Feels Great" : Would you have written that posting of the woman that did not open the door for you was African American, Spanish or any other non-Caucasian race? How do you know she was not just a bitch in general and had no manners. Is it of purpose to include that she was white? Have you had any other interactions with her that show you she is racist? Or are you just letting out your revenge on Caucasian people by assuming that naturally all white women would have to be bitches, since they are not Asian... thus being right in step with your "revenge" name?
Hannybunbun Monday, June 10, 2002 at 05:52:14 (PDT)

rare stuff,

You are right about the older generation of whites being less culturally sensitive: the women who stare at me tend to be in their 30's thru 50s. However, the older ones--60 and up--can sometimes be politer because they were taught manners.

The younger ones tend to do things like cut in line, something they might do to peeps of their own age. But by and large, they're generally better than the middle-aged bitches who act like they're entitled to everything, especially if they're upper middle class. They are the VERY worst.
Asian Dominatrix Sunday, June 09, 2002 at 22:49:05 (PDT)

Ellery,

It looks like this time you read me a little too literally. Trust me when I say that I really have not encountered any black or Hispanic woman looking at me UP and DOWN. They may have looked at me, but not in the condescending way I find intrusive. Come on, as I told you before, even my white friends have assumed that this behavior is most likely a mark of racism: ie., "I am white so I can look at you as I please because I am more powerful than you. "

Moreover, I live in Chicago where the white and black populations are roughly equal: in fact, the black population may even be greater by a few percentage points. Yet why is it that when I am stared at, the starer is inevitably white? Or that people who try to cut in front of me or that salesladies who ignore me are white? Now, these rude white women are by no means make up the majority of whites as I pointed out earlier. Most are decent folk. Yet, the ones who do act like they're entitled to everything are almost always white. And I'm only saying "almost" as to not be completely negative.

If you want to begin understanding what we Asians must deal with on an everyday level and at work, there are two books you must read. One is "Yellow" by Frank Wu. I highly recommend this book for Asians, whites, and blacks who want to understand not only the nature of discrimination that Asians have faced, but also the so-called reasoning behind racial profiling and assumptions that all Asians are foreigners. Wu also provides the best explanation of why affirmative action must go on and why Asians should NOT oppose it. Very, very readable and reasonable.

Some interesting facts: did you know that a greater percentage of whites are admitted to Harvard through alumni relations than minorities are admitted through affirmative action? Yet no one bitches about that. And that they get in lower grades? And did you know too that white women tend to be chief beneficiaries of aff. action rather than minorities?

There is also a lot about the Asian fundraising fiasco for Democratic National Committee--one which was blown way out of proportion-- and the Wen Ho Lee case. This is a MUST READ for ALL Asian Americans.

The second book, "Glass Ceilings and Asian Americans" is by Deborah Woo. If you never believed that Asians are discriminated against in academia and the workplace, this book gives all the proof: for instance, Asians earn less than whites even when they have very comparable education and work experience. Asians are frequently ASSUMED not to have leadership qualities and other personal qualities so that they are not as readily promoted.

You will learn about how some Asian women were denied tenure DESPITE having higher credentials than their white male peers. How AA women in academe are hired at much lower rates than whites with comparable degrees. How one woman was described as a "Chinese pussy,", "chink", "whore," "stupid slut" etc, not by a student, but by a white male SENIOR FACULTY MEMBER on her evaluation. And Asian men with college degrees make less than white men with the same. You will also learn that at one famous aerospace center, Asians with accents were also much more harshly judged than Europeans with accents.

BTW, about the family income of Asians being higher: that is only because Asian households tend to have multiple earners rather than a single earner in white households.

The plain fact is that Asians are much underrepresented in management and academia. I think whites find this fact uncomfortable to deal with because many like to assume that we are being dealt with fairly and that our credentials count. The fact tho' is that if you're Asian, you have even MORE to prove.

In all, there's just no way of getting around this glaring fact no matter how you look at it. Asians still face a lot of discrimination personally, academically, and professionally.
Asian Dominatrix Sunday, June 09, 2002 at 22:18:02 (PDT)

rare stuff,

I would have kept my keyboard shut had you initially put forward a legitimate comparison of ancient and modern European behavior in a "sensible modern context". My sister could start a fight in an empty room, and I would have been delighted if you had presented substantial evidence to say all it took was her exile to a cultural reeducation camp somewhere to correct her quick Irish temper. In all seriousness, my opinion of you being "far away from (your) Asian self" is based on nothing more than the bias you expressed in your initial post; it has nothing at all to do with you being a person of Asian descent. I won't belabor you with whole Bell Curve/nurture-nature thing, but I will tell you that you ought to reconsider the 'nature' side of your debate.

As to misinterpreting the theme of your earlier post - please don't backpedal from your initial position, then submit you were an "uncivilised barbarian" in your original post, and then ultimately question my own reading comprehension skills, and think you could get away with it. I don't see how stating "it is often said that Austrians are still spiteful, misanthropic and xenophobic," deducing the "behavior of many whites derives from very ancient habits" - not to mention citing Adolf Hitler as a famous Austrian to add support to your analysis - I don't see how these three statements leave any gray area for a reader to misinterpret the theme of your post as anything less than an attempt to draw a nexus between the barbarism of ancient Europe and the personal idiosyncracies (what you might argue as 'natural') of today's northern Europeans. I personally didn't think you sounded like an "uncivilised barbarian" in your original post; I just thought you were a bit misinformed.

Your assertion that it is my "political correctness" behind citing your offensive parallels against Europeans is somewhat skewed in light of the more widely held definition. Being objective and open-minded, appreciating different cultures, judging character before colour, having friends of all different backgrounds - last time I checked - was not "political correctness". On the contrary; forcefeeding me to embrace feelgood multicultural agendas, "concerned Asian-Americans" asking me to misspell the word 'Korea', Americans hyphenating their ethnic extraction in some insecure effort to augment their actual origin vis-�-vis 'who' they are, and a former U.S. Democratic president biting his bottom lip, "feeling the pain" of minorities - that is my definition of "political correctness". Therefore should you desire to read me the riot act for the former meaning, then I stand guilty as charged. But I assure you, I am the last person on this planet preaching Bubba's gospel, or supporting the more orthodox definition of "political correctness".

Now with all due respect to your mother and stepfather, I am not surprised you've used the myopic term "white-washed" in referring to your mother's marriage to your white stepfather in today's post to Asian Dominatrix. So let me ask you: what is your definition of a racist person?

In using "white-washed", your acrimony appears to be primarily towards whites and/or those Asians who do not subscribe to your own clannish beliefs. Your line of reasoning is not uncommon: racism often condemns those within relative proximity: i.e. Irish Republicans against British Loyalists in Northern Ireland, Palestinians against Israelis in the Middle East, Indonesians against ethnic Chinese, Indians against Pakistanis, whites in the American South against blacks - and all visa versa - the list is long and unfortunate. On a much smaller scale, are you making this same mistake in calling your own mother "white-washed" by citing your stepfather's racial extraction as a central reason for not approving your mother's marriage? You may have a good relationship with your mother and stepfather or you may feel alienated by them; I simply don't know and my question may be entirely presumptuous. But in using the epithet "white-washed" to describe your mother and her relationship with your stepfather - your stepfather being white should be a secondary factor in your judgement of him or their relationship.

Thank you nonetheless for your admission that you were the one being "morbid" enough in your original post. And again, I don't think you are an "uncivilised barbarian". I just think you should let race and ethnicity be of little relevance in your judgements of other people.

The prosecution rests.

Ellery Sunday, June 09, 2002 at 21:47:08 (PDT)

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