Annoyances of Asian American Life | Asian American Poll

ANNOYANCES OF
ASIAN AMERICAN LIFE
(Updated Tuesday, Apr 1, 2008, 05:25:43 PM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Which of the following is the most annoying occurrence to which Asian Americans are routinely subjected?
Being told you speak English well | 21%
Being asked where you're from, originally | 28%
Having (non-Asian) strangers address you with phrases in Asian languages | 23%
Being subjected to offensive media portrayals of Asians | 28%

Which of the following is the most common way in which racial hostility has been expressed toward you?
Hostile words spoken to your face | 9%
Hostile remarks to others within earshot | 41%
Slurs or taunts shouted from a distance | 17%
Spreading of malicious gossip about you | 6%
Pointedly excluding you from a conversation or event | 27%

In your experience what types of persons are most likely to show hostility toward Asians?
People with low educational levels | 24%
People from social backwaters | 17%
People insecure about their own places in society | 28%
People envious of Asian success | 11%
People with little contact with other ethnicities | 19%

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Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.

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WHAT YOU SAY

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curious girl,

I remember reading somewhere that you mentioned you were lower-middle-class. (Correct me if I'm wrong.) I thought maybe that's why you're as open-minded and perceptive as you are on these forums!

For the longest time, I was taught to believe that the most bigoted people were those below middle class by my family and my white uppermiddle class friends. I gradually learned otherwise. While it is true that some of the more bigoted lower-class types are less hesitant than upper-class sorts to bandy about epithets like "chink" or "gook" or even engage in violence (i.e., Vincent Chin's attackers), I think a lot of it just comes down to plain ignorance.

It's my guess that the upper middles refuse to use such terms, not so much because they're more liberal, but because they don't want to be confused with their so-called "social inferiors." Don't let this "I'm far too educated to be bigoted" attitude fool you, though. Their mode of discimination is more subtle: for instance, staring in a hostile manner or not acknowledging your presence (like looking at another person when you're talking to him/her), or making weak excuses as to why they dislike/hate Asians or any other minorities.

I might have mentioned this before, but I remember one of my white friends' fathers refusing to allow his daughter to go to a movie with a black friend "because he's black and people might assume you're dating one another." Or one guy who was disgusted that his stepdaughter was marrying an Asian man, a lower-class Asian man, no less! He complained about the husband's family not eating Western food because "they only like to eat cheap food."

If I have sounded negative about whites as I have, I think it is probably because of these attitudes I encountered from childhood through adulthood. But I do realize that these sorts of people probably only make up 5% of the US, even if most of my professional and social dealings are amongst those sorts of people.

Hey, it's great to know there are probably more whites out there like you than whites like the ones I've described. Kudos to you!
Asian Dominatrix Monday, July 22, 2002 at 11:33:07 (PDT)

curious girl,

I think it also depends on "old money" vs. "noveau riche".

Most noveau riche people are pretty much open to anything.

It is the old money and their old values you have to worry about.
AC Dropout Monday, July 22, 2002 at 09:49:10 (PDT)

Keppin' it real,

I meant that the media and the mainstream of society influenced by the media act like Asian heathens would be the same like Wiccans,Satanists, "UFOlogists" etc.

It is surely an annoyance for those who are isolated among whites and white-washed people,but bearable in the case that an Asian heathen has nothing to do with Christians,anti-religious people etc.
rare stuff Monday, July 22, 2002 at 07:27:26 (PDT)

Asian Dominatrix:

Fortunately for society and UNfortunately for those clench-jawed upper crust types, those of us who come from middle-class backgrounds who date and marry transethnically (as well as same-ethnic, non-White families) who are educated are upwardly mobile income-wise.

We're moving into those Upper-middle-class neighborhoods, our kids are going to school with their kids and they have no way of avoiding us. Some of those DOAR moms have sons and daughters who are meeting and dating educated African American, Asian American, Latin American and Multiethnic people openly and defiantly, and they can't do a damn thing about it. Already, we are taking positions on the boards of country clubs, the PTA, homeowners associations and the like and displacing the clench-jawed bigots who don't want Whites and non-Whites mixing.
Another generation, and they're out!!! (WM married to an AF) Monday, July 22, 2002 at 07:09:24 (PDT)

rare stuff,

"They lump us"

Who's "they"? and how do you figure?
Keppin' it real Saturday, July 20, 2002 at 00:57:24 (PDT)

Asian Dominatrix,

I agree with your assessment of racism in the different socio-economic layers of U.S. society. From my own limited experience, I have also found this to be the case. I am a WF dating an AM, and we are both of middle-class backgrounds, BUT we are both well educated, hard working and ambitious. Both of our families are very accepting of our relationship. People of my socio-economic class do tend to be more open in terms of friends, dating, and experiences. I think the very rich are too terrified to try anything different for fear of being rejected by "society" and "how it would look". But I would guess that there are some exceptions to this rule.
curious girl Friday, July 19, 2002 at 07:35:03 (PDT)

Keepin' it real,

there was an annoying post which claimed heathens would commit human sacrifice after I had protested against the discrimination against Asian heathens by Christians. (They lump us Asian heathens all together with Wiccans, Satanists, people believing in UFOs etc.)
rare stuff Thursday, July 18, 2002 at 13:28:10 (PDT)

Booyah,

Absolutely correct. I agree that upper class whites are the most hypocritical and racist even though they're seemingly well-educated--which makes it all the more deplorable. Many bigoted lower-middle-class people change their views when they meet "real" minorities--for instance, if they have a friendly minority colleague or if their son or daughter has a minority friend. On the other hand, most--not all--upper-class types refuse to change their prejudices. Why change them when it's benefitted them all their lives?

I've found that, generally speaking, those who have a real problem with Asians in good professions or even just Asians wearing fine clothes or driving a nice car are uppermiddle class folks and above. Because suddenly, they see a minority having what they think belongs only to whites. How dare they usurp whitey's rightful place??? Hence, you have idiots complaining about AFs being "materialistic" while praising WFs for being "stylish."

But do those people really marry AFs--or AMs? I would think they'd prefer to have a trophy blonde/"alpha" white male. You know, to look good at the country club. Or the charity ball. Who wants a darky?

Usually, the WMs who marry AFs--and WFs who marry AMs--tend to be middle class or below. They may be well-educated, morally upstanding, and ambitious, but they definitely will not be your Enron/Worldcom/Wall Street types. Usually those semi-educated Ivy dumbass fratboys/sorority girls don't even want to have anything to do with minorities, either socially or professionally. And we're happy with it, too.
Asian Dominatrix Wednesday, July 17, 2002 at 21:19:42 (PDT)

In my experience, the most racist people have been whites that occupy the upper echelons of society. They act nice, but are deep down hypocritically racist. Many of the working class whites are actually more open minded. They themselves are being oppressed by the upper echelon whites. Adversity breeds character.

The worst are the incompetent whites that occupy the upper floors of society. They got there by virtue of their skin color and are insecure about it. Unfortunately, many of the AF I know have married such people.
Booyah Wednesday, July 17, 2002 at 15:03:09 (PDT)

To the Guy who think Rare Stuff is Gay!

There is absolutely no way that Rare Stuff could be gay. And this is coming from a girl who's been posting to him for weeks now.

I know how gay men talk. I have a few very good friends who are gay and who consider me as a sister friend (gay men are just like you and me; they also need close female friends, even as they need their male lovers).

Rare Stuff does not have the same thought patterns or mentallity of the gay male. He's very very alpha male, indeed, and he projects his maleness not just at females but also at other males. In fact, his thought patterns are so intensely male that I tend to feel somewhat intimidated by his very maleness.

However, given what I've said, I have also noticed that the only males who will try to point fingers and accuse another man as being gay is one who's not very secure with his own sexual identity and must validate himself by pushing others down. Good luck on trying that with Rare Stuff because he's a strong fighter. I think you will get the worst end of the fight.

MLK Wednesday, July 17, 2002 at 11:42:22 (PDT)

How the hell did all this talk about "human sacrifice" even get started in the first place?????????????

Keepin' it real Sunday, July 14, 2002 at 21:21:10 (PDT)

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