Race Factor in Friendships | Asian American Poll

THE RACE FACTOR IN FRIENDSHIPS
(Updated Wednesday, Jan 22, 2025, 06:39:09 AM to reflect the 100 most recent valid responses.)

Assuming you are Asian American, what race is the majority of your closest friends?
Asian | 48%
White | 49%
African American | 2%
Latino | 1%

Assuming you are Asian American, what's the best thing about making Asian friends?
Shared experiences | 28%
Shared cultural and social customs | 11%
Not wondering about subtle prejudices | 52%
Similarity of attitude and temperament | 9%

Assuming you are Asian American, what's the best thing about making non-Asian friends?
Expanding social/cultural horizons | 48%
Escaping the prejudices of other Asians | 34%
More acceptance from society at large | 0%
Freedom from cultural restraints | 18%

This poll is closed to new input.
Comments posted during the past year remain available for browsing.

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WHAT YOU SAY

[This page is closed to new input. --Ed.]

Hey "Blacks are different", is that where you get your education in current events, from the television? Have you ever stopped to think that maybe that's how blacks are portrayed in the media, as troublemakers, hooligans and thugs? I bet the idea never even crossed your ignorant mind, has it? There are blacks who conduct themselves with the highest standards and pride, just as there are asians and whites who, for lack of a better term, act trashy. I suggest that you might want to look beyond the tip of your racist nose and wake up to reality, instead of living in your own little dream-world. You sound like a Sally Jesse Raphael reject. If I met you, I would more than likely would not care for your company either. Tit for tat, my friend.
Mr. Brownstone Tuesday, August 21, 2001 at 11:34:18 (PDT)

Though I am an Indian, my best friend is a Malaysian Chinese.
Indian Tuesday, August 21, 2001 at 08:14:24 (PDT)

Black people in general are annoying I find and really wouldn't care for their company. Then again maybe its because I live in a major city in US and everytime I turn on the TV its a black man getting arrested. Or maybe its the manner in which blacks seem to conduct themselves in public that I find annoying.
Anyway, I have nothing to gain with them so......
blacks are different Monday, August 20, 2001 at 20:52:56 (PDT)

to JJK
I speak on behalf of Hanya. I'm Korean (1/2). I really do not believe that Blacks and Mexicans consume more alcohol than whites. I agree with Mr."Asian" and that you fall into the percentage of "us" who woship whites (not that it is entirely bad), but to a point where a person idolizes the white genre and assuming that they do not have problems the same as minority groups because they dominate the population and landscape is absurd. I suggest you check statistics, or better yet, you might think of getting out more and not isolating yourself. If I was Black, or Mexican, why would I go all the way to a liqour store in another neighborhood just so I could escape the scriutiny of those (like you, perhaps) that think they consume more alcohol.
No, I'm not a sellout.
michael kittrell ram@osaka.email.ne.jp Monday, August 20, 2001 at 18:39:52 (PDT)

I think it's funny that JJK mentions that BLacks/Mexicans drink more than Whites, as to the reason that there are more Asians stores in Black neighborhoods. It reminded me of a comment that was made a long time ago. Someone said that Blacks are lazy & they use other races to get what they want. Isn't that what Asian stores are doing in Black neighborhoods. They take Black & Latino money & out only to put it into White neighborhoods! I JUST THINK THAT'S FUNNY. OH, I THINK I'M GONNA HURL!
Oh, as far as well-to-do Black neighborhoods... I live in one of them, sweetheart!
Alexandria 81 Monday, August 20, 2001 at 18:02:24 (PDT)

Asian,

Just because asians marry whites does not mean we "worship" them. What kind of a stupid comment is that?

And you are also pretty dumb to say that whites do not go to asian shops because they do not want to deal w/ bad english. What shops are you talking about anyways?

Isn't it obvious that Asians go to white neighborhoods because they have better schools? Tell me a VERY black neighborhood, WILLING to accept people of any other race, that has GOOD schools (as in public schools).

I know GOOD is a relative term here, but I'm asking for the TOP public school in the nation that is located in an almost all black neighborhood.
jjk Monday, August 20, 2001 at 14:44:56 (PDT)

jjk,

"Are you really Asian or not? I think you made the stupidest comments I'll ever hear from an Asian (sorry)."

Don't you think you are stupid to question my ethnicity based on what I wrote? Do all Asians think the same or better yet, do all Asians think like you? That was a rather stupid comment. Disagree if you like but to make it an Asian or not issue is rather sad.

Sure Asians tell themselves they move to White neighborhoods because of the schools and the relative safety. But as you mentioned, if Black neighborhoods, had the same attributes, guess what? Most Asians would still move to White neighborhoods anyway. And as far as business, many Asian stores make more money in the inner city than in White neighborhoods. Why, cheaper overhead obviously. And because Whites prefer to do business with Whites. And many Whites don't like to put up with bad English as many Blacks in the inner city are forced to do because of lack of choices. And the only store that usually does well in White neighborhoods, is a cleaners.

Sure the schools are better and the streets are safer, despite the occassional racial harrassment. But in the end Asians in all White neighborhoods, learn to despise their own skin, hate their parents for having accents and are ashamed that their homes smell funny, according to their White friends. In the end I don't know if the good outweighs the bad, if in the end, you get a good education and are safe but hate yourself and can only feel better if you marry someone White. Maybe better to retain some of your racial pride.

And Asians have long ago proven they worship Whites, the only group that outmarries more than Asians are Native Americans, need I say more.
Asian Monday, August 20, 2001 at 06:18:20 (PDT)

big man on campus, eh?
You probably get beat up the most on your campus. Probably beat up by girls too. So, get off the computer and read some books you nerd. Get off the campus and see how big you are. M*****F*ck*r... Picking on the ladies? Who the hell taught you manners? Your father? Well he should be b*tch slapped a few times. I'm sure you are a racist, but you try to point the finger at other people and accuse them. At your next KKK rally, tell all your relatives that they need to clean the sheets around the ass because I'm sure that with all the shit you talk there have to be stains overflowing.

Bring it. (A friend of Ms. Wednesday)
I'm out of here.
K.Hanya Monday, August 20, 2001 at 04:34:16 (PDT)

I agree with Ms.Wednesday. (I'm American too, but I'm not a "wanker")
michael kittrell ram@osaka.email.ne.jp Monday, August 20, 2001 at 04:27:42 (PDT)

To big man on campus,

Go f**k yourself. You're just looking for some kind of argument. Get a f***ing attitude with some racist asshole that's writing derrogatory things that seriously offend others. Get a life...better, get a hobby!
I'm right, you're wrong. I've been to America, and if white people can't get jobs there, trust me, they can relocate to another geographical region and their problems will be solved. My Asian friends don't have that luxury. I don't understand why you have written all this shit about me. Don't waste your time about writing bullsh*t that doesn't even concern you.

you're a stupid american wanker
(no offense to my real american friends)
Ms. Wednesday Monday, August 20, 2001 at 04:26:19 (PDT)

kamen hanya,

Excuse me, but did I hear that right? PLENTY of black neighborhoods that match the rich white ones?

Sure there might be plenty, as in maybe 1000 predominently rich black neighborhoods, but the number is MINISCULE compared to rich white neighborhoods.

Umm and your generalization that white people don't buy at korean shops is wrong. I live in the South where racism is believed to be most rampant and never saw anyone who'd reject korean grocery or laundry places. Maybe there are some, but they are the true white minorities.

Koreans open business in inner cities around black neighborhoods, especially liquor stores, because blacks/mexicans generally buy much more of alcoholic beverages (especially expensive ones), than whites.

I've known someone who owned a liquor store in a black inner city neighborhood, and they tell me that liquor business won't sell well in white neighborhoods not because they are racist, but rather because black/mexican counterparts consume way more liquor. Kapish?
jjk Sunday, August 19, 2001 at 20:36:48 (PDT)

I do agree whith the person that said people of ALL colors who try to act White move ahead faster. My boss listens to how I talk (rather than what I'm actually saying), the people I associate with, & the music I listen to (Kate Bush & Metal). She thinks I am one of those UTs & I have become one of the most trusted people at my job. I guess I am a well trained monkey, aren't I? Even on my application, she saw that I went to a private grade & high school. This makes me pissed for one reason, the Black girls that I work with are some of THE smartest, nicest, & honest people I have EVER met. They haven't moved as far as I have because they don't act as "proper" as I do. They speak their minds with soul & feeling, they won't take crap from anyone, & they will tell you how they feel (honesty). They are scared of those girls & I guess they don't see me as a threat or something. Rather than punishing those girls, they reward me. They treat me to lunch, I get PTO (personal time off) or I could srew up & boss will let it slide. It's a way to turn us against each other. NICE TRY, BUT NO CIGAR FOR YOU. Here's the funny thing that I have seen happen... Those "Uncle Toms" will, sometimes, turn around & help their fellow brothas & sistahs move to the top. It doesn't happen much, but it DOES happen. Why can't there be more people of color like this? The real UTs just turn White & keep going. It's like, "Well, I got here why can't you" rather than helping the rest of us atleast try to advance.
Alexandria 81 UT Incognito Saturday, August 18, 2001 at 12:52:24 (PDT)

to JJK
There are plenty of Black neighborhoods in America that offer safe & clean services, proper education and Koreans are Asian, right? There's a Korean grocery store in almost every inner city and white people don't even shop at Korean stores if they open businesses in their neighborhoods. That's the east coast report. The evidence is still strong against that rusty old excuse. I don't care anymore about Asian people's motives to assimilate with whites and I don't need to make myself "proper" to get Asian people to be my friends, but there are other people that are interested in having good relationships with them and I think that making excuses like the ones you gave just help you hide behind the true reason, which only YOU know. I don't want to say it because if I do you will deny it and accuse me of being a hater. I have talked to a lot of people, and the stories Asian women give are a lot different than males. I wonder why?
Kamen Hanya Friday, August 17, 2001 at 18:38:09 (PDT)

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